In this episode of the EZ Conversations Podcast, Dr. Eddie O’Connor, a clinical sport performance psychologist, discusses his work with high achievers, including athletes, musicians, and business professionals. He addresses common issues such as performance anxiety, perfectionism, and the importance of having purpose in adversity. Dr. O’Connor explains the concept of ‘pain with purpose’ and emphasizes the necessity of embracing challenges and discomfort to achieve excellence. He also introduces accepting anxiety as a regular part of striving for high performance and the importance of focusing on the present moment. Additionally, Dr. O’Connor offers resources on his website to help individuals overcome mental obstacles.

Dr. Eddie O’Connor is a clinical sport and performance psychologist specializing in performance anxiety, perfectionism and imposter syndrome. He is a Fellow and Certified Mental Performance Consultant through the Association for Applied Sport Psychology and a United States Olympic and Paralympic Committee Mental Health Registry member. He is the author and host of “The Psychology of Performance: How to Be Your Best in Life” through The Great Courses. Dr. Eddie owns the Success Stories Community, an online platform where you can overcome obstacles to excellence. 

Find Dr. O’Connor online:

1. www.DrEddieOConnor.com
2. Success Stories Community
3. FREE VIDEO “What To Do When Positive Thinking Doesn’t Work”
4. https://linktr.ee/DrEddieOC

Timestamps:

03:33 Introduction to Dr. O’Connor

03:56 Understanding High Achievers

06:02 The Role of Anxiety in Performance

11:02 Exploring Basic Human Emotions

17:36 Perfectionism and Learning from Mistakes

27:07 Commitment Over Motivation

33:11 The Cost of Excellence

33:36 Respecting Excellence and Sacrifice

34:44 The Reality of Being Elite

35:23 Commitment Over Motivation

35:42 Debunking the 10,000 Hour Rule

38:00 Getting into the Zone

38:26 Handling Anxiety and Preparation

40:29 Mindfulness and Present Moment

42:28 Embracing Difficulty for Success

43:59 Free Resources and Final Thoughts

Sponsors of the Podcast:

• BetterHelp: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/ez10⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for 10% off your first month of therapy
• WeShape: https://weshape.postaffiliatepro.com/scripts/dcfogwyuk?a_aid=FurkhanDandia&a_bid=d7508fa8 for 35% all plans.
• Aura: https://aura.com/ez10 for a free two-week trial
• Plunge: https://plunge.com/ez
• Mint Mobile: ⁠https://trymintmobile.com/ez10⁠ for 15$ for an unlimited cell phone plan
• We Are Wild for 25% off your first order: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://zen.ai/EZ23⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you would like to support EZ Conversations, here are all the ways you can do that:

• Instagram⁠⁠:⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/eunoiazen⁠⁠⁠
• ⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://m.facebook.com/eunoiazen⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• YouTube⁠⁠: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrqBp_zdRiIfBRV4wURSZ2A⁠⁠⁠
• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/furkhan-dandia-macp-mba-072a8a1ba/⁠
• Patreon: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠patreon.com/EzConversations⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Or find Furkhan’s Book, Pursuit of Self Love: 30 Uplifting Messages and Reflections. The Kindle version is available on Amazon: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.amazon.ca/Pursuit-Self-Love-Uplifting-Messages-Reflections-ebook/dp/B0C4D1XYL1⁠⁠⁠

Subscribe to the EZ Reflections Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://ez-reflections-newsletter.beehiiv.com

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Furkhan Dandia Therapist and Coach

I am a men's coach, therapist, group facilitator, podcaster and author. My journey began five years ago when I was going through a separation. I found myself alone and in a shame spiral that our culture and society covertly exert on people due to the perceived "failure" of a marriage. Unfortunately, I personalized that message which led me to fall deeper into a hole, causing me to surround myself with people that did not serve me and engage in substance abuse. While seeking therapy, I was not making the wholesale changes I needed.

As part of my experience with therapy, I realized that I am not alone in the challenges men my age experience (I separated at the age of 34/35). I realized I could be a voice for men like myself and offer support in this space. In the middle of the pandemic, I applied for a Master's degree in Psychology to become a therapist. This change was a significant shift for me as I worked in the corporate world as an engineer. Once I leaned into the space of supporting other men, I also started a podcast to normalize these difficult conversations and started a men's group a year later with the support of a friend.

I thought I was giving something back when I started the men's group. However, I quickly realized I was getting substantially more from the connections I built than I initially anticipated. It was also something I needed because I was going through another breakup.

At that point, I also realized that I had not taken the time to heal, and I was outsourcing my healing through romantic relationships, substances, material acquisitions and superficial relationships. I decided to step away from the outgoing lifestyle and started to focus on my healing which was another phase of evolution for me on my journey. Over the last year and a half, I have become mindful of the people I spend my time with. I have cleaned my lifestyle of substances, toxic environments and behaviours. I have focused on my sleep, my health and my knowledge. I have improved my spiritual relationship with myself, which was lacking the most over the past five years. This is the best I have felt.

As part of my solitude journey and to find myself again, I also released a book encapsulating my journey, which I hope to share with others. My book is titled: The Pursuit of Self-Love.