Wednesday - June 24th, 2026
Apple News
×

What can we help you find?

Open Menu
Paul Colaianni Behavior and Relationship Coach

've been a Behavior and Relationship Coach since 2009 and am the host of two podcasts.

Love and Abuse is all about how to navigate the difficult relationship, while The Overwhelmed Brain is a show about how to deal with the difficulties in life.

The shows can be found at theoverwhelmedbrain.com and loveandabuse.com, respectively.

I currently live in north Atlanta, Georgia, with my fiancée Asha.

Recent Content

Loading...
The Bare Minimum Needed For Any Close Relationship &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
The bare minimum needed for any close relationship

You'd think love and connection would be enough to get through any relationship challenge. But there is something stronger, something deeper that allows feelings to grow and the bond to strengthen.

You'd think love and…

You'd think love and connection would be enough to get through any relationship challenge. But there is something stronger, something deeper that allows feelings to grow and the bond to strengthen.

Listen · 41:47
Should I Reveal My Past To A Potential New Partner &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
Should I reveal my past to a potential new partner

If you have a history that you're not proud of, and you start a new relationship, should the new potential partner be advised of a past you regret? If you don't tell, will it bring consequences down t…

If you have a histor…

If you have a history that you're not proud of, and you start a new relationship, should the new potential partner be advised of a past you regret? If you don't tell, will it bring consequences down the road? It's a question some people wrestle with.

Listen · 38:29
Are These Old Emotional Wounds Or Something Real Happening Now? &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
Are these old emotional wounds or something real happening now?

Are old emotional wounds triggering you today? A woman reached out and shares her struggles about choices she made about a pregnancy and how her partner may have lied about his communication with his …

Are old emotional wo…

Are old emotional wounds triggering you today? A woman reached out and shares her struggles about choices she made about a pregnancy and how her partner may have lied about his communication with his ex at the beginning of their relationship. Challenging topics to cover.

Listen · 46:15
The On Again Off Again Relationship And Other Challenging Topics &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
The on again off again relationship and other challenging topics

Can the on-off relationship work? What about long-distance Relationships? I talk about that and also someone asked me if it's their social Anxiety or someone's rude behavior that's to blame. It's a gr…

Can the on-off relat…

Can the on-off relationship work? What about long-distance relationships? I talk about that and also someone asked me if it's their social anxiety or someone's rude behavior that's to blame. It's a grab bag episode today.

Listen · 47:04
Some People Don'T Want You To Be Yourself &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
Some people don't want you to be yourself

Other people's insecurities should not make you change for them. If they can't handle who you are, is it on you to make them comfortable or should they just adjust, adapt, or leave you alone?

Other people's insec…

Other people's insecurities should not make you change for them. If they can't handle who you are, is it on you to make them comfortable or should they just adjust, adapt, or leave you alone?

Listen · 45:52
How To Be Direct About Someone'S Hurtful Behavior Without Being Confrontational &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
How to be direct about someone's hurtful behavior without being confrontational

You're allowed to tell someone they're hurting you — and if you feel stuck because you avoid conflict or keep punishing with silence, I've been there and will show you how to say it plainly so you k…

You're allowed to te…

You're allowed to tell someone they're hurting you — and if you feel stuck because you avoid conflict or keep punishing with silence, I've been there and will show you how to say it plainly so you know whether they change or reveal who they really are.

Listen · 35:41
Always Take What Sounds Like A Threat Seriously &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
Always take what sounds like a threat seriously

People who threaten, belittle, or use "jokes" about violence are practicing control, and they will gaslight you into submission if you don't take their threats or "jokes" seriously. Don't reward coerc…

People who threaten,…

People who threaten, belittle, or use "jokes" about violence are practicing control, and they will gaslight you into submission if you don't take their threats or "jokes" seriously. Don't reward coercion with compliance.

Listen · 39:39
The Past Is The Worst Place To Ruminate &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
The past is the worst place to ruminate

Are you a victim of your past choices forever? If the future feels impossible because the past is unavoidable, it might be time to put away the mirror and forge the path you want.

Are you a victim of …

Are you a victim of your past choices forever? If the future feels impossible because the past is unavoidable, it might be time to put away the mirror and forge the path you want.

Listen · 37:58
When Good Enough Is Much Less Than You Want To Settle For &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
When good enough is much less than you want to settle for

Some people have a progress bar that stops when things are no longer uncomfortable. That can work for some people. But for others who want more out of life, it could present an incompatibility that's …

Some people have a p…

Some people have a progress bar that stops when things are no longer uncomfortable. That can work for some people. But for others who want more out of life, it could present an incompatibility that's hard to get past.

Listen · 45:51
They Do Wrong, You Get Blamed &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
They do wrong, you get blamed

Someone who constantly blames and criticizes you may have something to hide. Someone who hurts you is hiding nothing at all... it's all very apparent. Don't ever think their behaviors are your fault.

Someone who constant…

Someone who constantly blames and criticizes you may have something to hide. Someone who hurts you is hiding nothing at all... it's all very apparent. Don't ever think their behaviors are your fault.

Listen · 31:54
When What You Did Is Always Thrown Back In Your Face &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
When what you did is always thrown back in your face

You did bad... a long time ago, but you still have to pay for what you did every time someone brings it up. They just can't let it go and you're reaching the end of your rope. When will they move on?

You did bad... a lon…

You did bad... a long time ago, but you still have to pay for what you did every time someone brings it up. They just can't let it go and you're reaching the end of your rope. When will they move on?

Listen · 41:29
Life And Relationship Questions You May Want The Answers To &Raquo; Tob Podcast Cover Final Highres 20240626 L40Oxgsmps 5
Life and relationship questions you may want the answers to

Some of us can go through life without the answers to the most pertinent questions. Others, like me, feel like there's something missing if we don't get those answers. I do my best to answer a few of …

Some of us can go th…

Some of us can go through life without the answers to the most pertinent questions. Others, like me, feel like there's something missing if we don't get those answers. I do my best to answer a few of those burning questions in this episode.

Listen · 49:27