Life has a way of testing us, whether it’s through natural disasters (LA is still on fire), personal loss (death of a parent, friend or spouse), illness (Cancer or hysterectomy), or career upheaval (getting fired, let go or pushed out).

For anyone interacting with your coworker, neighobr or friend out West, offering support can feel daunting. What do you say? What do you do? How do you truly help?

Here are seven practical approaches to support someone navigating tough times, including job loss—a stressor that often carries not only financial but also emotional weight.

1. “What can I do to support you now?”

Support looks different for everyone. Instead of assuming, ask. Some might appreciate a hug, a visitor, or a home-cooked meal. Others may need solitude to heal, nap, or simply rest. With job loss specifically, avoid rushing in with advice like “Have you updated your résumé?” Instead, ask, “Would it be helpful if I connected you with someone in my network when you are more specific?”

2. Check in—but thoughtfully.

Stop asking “how are you?” It’s lazy.

Constantly asking, “How are you?” may unintentionally pull people back into their Grief or Stress. People still ask how my Mom’s cancer is depsite her living a full cancer free. Instead, try softer approaches that acknowledge their situation without requiring a detailed response. For someone who lost their job, a message like, “I’m thinking of you. Let me know if you need to vent or brainstorm when you’re ready,” offers space and reassurance.

3. “You don’t have to reply, but I’m thinking of you.”

Sometimes, the most meaningful messages are the ones that don’t demand an answer. When someone is dealing with loss or stress, fielding questions—no matter how well-intentioned—can be exhausting. Skip the urge to dig for details and offer simple kindness instead.

Stop asking for the dirty details—are you a doctor, are you able to process the medical details or are you asking in fear?

4. Be specific in your offers.

Decision-making under stress is hard. Instead of a vague “Let me know if you need anything’ or “call me if you need anything” is impossible for someone who is having a hard time asking for help. Try to offer something concrete. For example:

• “I’m grabbing dinner from the butcher today. Can I pick up a premade meal for you? They have chicken, vegetarian or steak options.”

• “I’m heading to the grocery store—do you need any staples, what would taste good, or what can I get for your kids even if you aren’t hungry?”
  This is especially helpful for someone navigating a job loss, as they may be managing tight finances or feeling overwhelmed about their next steps.

5. Help them lighten the load.

Practical help can feel like a lifeline. Whether it’s grabbing their kids for paydates or sleepovers so they can REST, rdropping off returns at UPS, returning library books, picking up dry cleaning, or doing kid pick up will ease their stress. Getting kids out of the house helps if they have interviews or meeting prep. With job loss, this could mean helping edit a résumé or providing guidance with LinkedIn.

6. Bring a touch of joy.

Sometimes, a small act of kindness can be a welcome distraction. A funny movie recommendation, a reel to make you laugh, a hilarious gift (thank you squirrel socks) a favorite snack, or even a handwritten note can remind someone they are loved and supported, even in difficult times.

7. Avoid rushing to next steps.

When someone is in crisis—whether it’s planning a funeral, undergoing treatment, or figuring out their next career move—they may not have the mental bandwidth to discuss the future. Avoid statements like, “You’ll be great” or “What’s your plan now?” Instead, allow them to be in the moment. Sitting with the frustration or devastation can often help people process and move through it more effectively.

Final Thought:
Supporting someone during their hardest moments is less about perfect words and more about being present in a way that’s meaningful to them. By offering specific help, honoring their process, and showing up without expectations, we can truly make a difference.

Have you supported someone through a tough time? Or been on the receiving end of meaningful care? I’d love to hear your thoughts—share in the comments or reply to this post.

Lynn Mull Holistic Career Coach & Author

Career Coach | Author | WellNess Advisor | Reiki Master
I offer Clarity through Reiki healing sessions, and Holistic Career Coaching and Facilitating Teams to professional wellness. I use various tools and methods to speak, write, and provide 1.1 counsel to move out of the stuck into the actions that help you or your teams reach their goals.I found my way because I had to create it.
As a working parent and a sandwich caregiver in my early 30s, I understand the pressures to keep going, provide for my family and prioritize everyone else’s wellbeing.

I looked in many corners and could not find one coach to break into my inner blockages and move my career until Reiki and a Career Coach got me there. We can be all the things to everyone, but first, we must get aligned and intuitively move forward for our own .