I recently watched a friend die. I was in the room, witnessing the unplugging of her life support while trying to support her family in their decision before and after it was done. It was the hardest day of my own life so far, by far. And as unprepared I was for the event and emotions, I also didn’t expect to become more prepared for my own death.
Talking about death has never scared me — It’s not like we can escape it— but I get why many of us want to avoid the topic, especially when it comes to our own eventual demise. Talking about death feels heavy, messy, and uncomfortably real. But what’s more frightening to me, is avoidance. The kind that leaves our loved ones guessing, unsure, and unprepared when everything falls apart.
The hardest part of planning for the inevitable isn’t the logistics—it’s finding the courage to start the conversation. But then I think about the alternative: the questions no one can answer because they didn’t ask. And now they have to make critical decisions leaving the weight of uncertainty hanging over the people I care about most. That’s what pushes me forward. Not because I’m fearless, but because I refuse to let fear have the last word.
You see, confidence doesn’t come before this type of conversation. It shows up in the middle of it, somewhere between the tears, the uncomfortable pauses, and the sighs of relief when you realize you’re finally saying the things that matter most.
And I want that for you, which is why this episode of the podcast is about The D Word.
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