Julie Manano, a licensed marriage and family therapist, specializes in working with couples using emotionally focused Therapy for couples. She focuses on attachment styles, particularly the anxious-avoidant dynamic. A healthy relationship is defined by compatibility, shared values, and effective conflict management. Conflict is an opportunity for Growth and bonding but must be managed with emotional safety. Change in attachment style can happen within a relationship, but it requires awareness, understanding, and time. The deeper questions to ask in a relationship involve exploring fears, views of self, and shame. Love languages are not enough to replace emotional bonding. In this conversation, Eli Weinstein discusses his book and the importance of understanding Relationships’ underlying emotions and behaviors. He emphasizes the need for self-reflection and self-awareness to create positive behavior change. Weinstein also highlights the negative cycles that couples often get caught in and provides examples of how to break free from them. He discusses the importance of recognizing that partners are on the same team and need to support each other emotionally. Additionally, he addresses the challenges of adjusting to changes in a relationship and the importance of patience and growth.

Chapter:

• 00:00 Introduction to Julie Manano and Attachment Styles
• 01:28 Defining Healthy Relationships and Conflict Management
• 05:09 Breaking the Ideal of No Conflict in Relationships
• 08:56 The Role of Repair in Relationships
• 10:22 Understanding Change in Attachment Styles
• 13:13 Fear of Vulnerability and Change in Relationships
• 14:40 The Importance of Attachment Styles in Relationships
• 16:30 Changing Attachment Styles Within a Relationship
• 18:24 Balancing Repair and Attachment Style Work in Therapy
• 21:09 Exploring Deeper Questions in Relationships
• 23:02 The Limitations of Love Languages in Relationships
• 24:26 A Different Approach to Love and Relationships
• 24:54 Understanding the Underlying Emotions and Behaviors
• 27:18 Recognizing the Complexity of Relationship Problems
• 33:56 Partners on the Same Team: Emotional Support
• 37:20 Sympathy over Empathy: Connecting to Feelings
• 48:28 Breaking Free from Negative Cycles

Julie Menanno (MA, LMFT, LCPC) is a licensed marriage and family therapist specializing in Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples. She also provides insight and advice for couples at @TheSecureRelationship on Instagram, with over one million followers. She founded and runs the Bozeman Therapy & Counseling clinic, and The Secure Relationship Coaching. She lives in Bozeman, Montana, with her husband and six children.

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Eli Weinstein Eli Weinstein, LCSW

Eli Weinstein is a licensed clinical therapist, devoted husband, and father of two, based in sunny Las Vegas. He runs a thriving private practice serving clients in both New York and Nevada, blending expert clinical insight with an approachable, no-nonsense style that makes mental health support relatable and accessible.

Driven by a passion for breaking mental health stigmas, Eli founded ELIvation and The Dude Therapist podcast to create real, down-to-earth conversations about mental health, fatherhood, parenting, and relationships. His podcast features candid interviews with world-renowned experts like Dr. Edith Eger, Apollo Ohno, Dr. Nicole LePera, and Tina Bryson. He’s also been featured on major platforms like The Kelly Clarkson Show, The Trauma Therapist, Mimosas With Moms, and many others.

Eli’s mission is clear: to empower people with the tools and insights they need to overcome life’s struggles while embracing authenticity, compassion, and a healthy dose of humor. His signature “No BS” approach feels like talking to a trusted friend—who also happens to be a licensed professional.

In addition to his podcast, Eli is set to release a parenting and relationships-focused book with Wiley Publishers, expanding his efforts to make mental health conversations engaging and actionable for all.

Whether through therapy sessions, podcasting, or public speaking, Eli’s goal remains the same: to inspire hope, foster growth, and remind people that with the right support, the life they envision is possible.