By Rosalind Sedacca Following divorce it’s tempting to turn your children into “spies.” Don’t go there! When children are told to report on the activities of the other parent, it places the children in a no-win situation. Even worse, using your children as spies has other negative consequences. It promotes lying and deceit. Not surprisingly, encouraging spying also leads to picking sides. And it often creates loyalty conflicts for your children. As a result, your kids may clam up, become untruthful, or untrustworthy. Not surprisingly, it’s not easy to break the habit of inappropriately questioning your children after they return from time spent with their other parent. However, it must be done. It helps to think about it from your child’s perspective. How do your kids feel when transitioning from one home to the other? Is it tense, uncomfortable, stressful? Remember that when they return to you, they want to
The post Using Your Children As Spies Post-Divorce: Don’t Do It! appeared first on Child-Centered Divorce.
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