Time flies when you are having fun.

I have said this many times in my life. In many cases, it has been true. As I have noted in my book, The Time-Optimized Life, our consumption of time is objective, and our feelings of time are subjective.

“We measure time in so many ways. There are objective methods tied to specific segments like seconds, minutes, hours, days, months, years, and decades. We also provide arbitrary measures to our time. When some event or experience is enjoyable, we can proclaim the time went by quickly. Conversely, time can move slowly when it is an activity we do not like. Our perspective of time can be skewed, depending on the circumstances.”

The origin of the “time flies when you are having fun” phrase is said to come out of a Chinese proverb. It made its way into an English idiom sometime in the 19^th century.

Over time, I have come to look at this saying a little differently. While time can fly when we are happy, it can also impact us during other emotional timeframes which can cause us to ask, “Where did the time go?”

Our emotional and physical states can dramatically alter our perception of time, focusing on scenarios of sadness, anger, loneliness, and poor health. These experiences tend to make time feel more viscous, slow, and oppressive. It can also make us wonder what happened to all that time?

In Times of Sadness

When experiencing sadness, time can feel extraordinarily elongated and heavy. Moments seem to stretch endlessly, with each minute feeling like an hour. The emotional weight creates a sense of stagnation, where memories replay repeatedly, and the present moment feels trapped in a slow, painful loop.

In times like these, it is important to plan with activities that push you to refocus your efforts in areas that provide positive emotional support. Your calendar should reflect periods of social interaction with friends and family.

In Times of Anger

During intense anger, time perception becomes fragmented and disruptive. Moments of rage can feel both instantaneous and interminable. The physiological arousal of anger floods the body with Stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline, which can distort time perception.

In times like these, some individuals report that angry episodes feel like they simultaneously last forever and pass in a blinding instant. Again, the better you are at planning your time, looking at ways you can accomplish personal and professional goals – the better you keep yourself from being diverted to irritated time consumption.

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The Time Optimized Life reframes the reactive nature of time management and replaces it with a proactive method of time optimization. Drawing from exclusive data captured by the Time Management Analysis (TMA), the book walks the reader through a comprehensive system that is easily adaptable to a particular personality or experience level.

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In Times of Loneliness

Loneliness creates a particularly challenging time perception. Without external social stimuli and meaningful interactions, time can feel incredibly slow and monotonous. Each minute can feel like an arduous journey, with internal ruminations and lack of engaging experiences making time seem to crawl.

Neuroscientific research indicates that social isolation can trigger a neurochemical response that makes time perception feel more protracted and psychologically challenging.

In times like these, as an introvert, I understand I have a time blind spot when it comes to social Relationships. Therefore, I am mindful that I need to cultivate a deep social network now, so that meaningful relationships will be there as I age. It inspired me to create the Social Network Audit form.

In Times of Poor Health

When experiencing poor health, particularly chronic conditions or significant pain, time perception becomes deeply subjective. Moments of physical discomfort can feel eternally long, with each second marked by physical sensations that seem to elongate time. The opposite can also happen, where, in the management of pain, time is lost.

Pain creates a hyper-awareness of bodily experiences, making time feel slower and more oppressive. Chronic illness can create a sense of temporal distortion where recovery seems distant and present moments feel interminable.

In times like these, personal care should be a necessary investment of your time. Sleeping 7 hours a night, exercising 150 minutes a week, and taking breaks during the day are three simple ways to start to improve and maintain your health.

These experiences contrast sharply with the “time flies when you’re having fun” phenomenon. While positive experiences compress time, negative emotional and physical states expand and distort our temporal perception, creating a subjective experience where time feels like a heavy, immovable entity rather than a fluid, quick-moving stream. On the other hand, pessimism, discouragement, and rejection can make time feel lost as we try to come out the other side.

Be proactive in your planning, adaptive in your execution, and patient in your use of time. It may not always fly by, it may not be fun, but it will also be a resource to use and not something to ignore.

David Buck is the author of the book The Time-Optimized Life, owner of Kairos (Time) Management Solutions, LLC. Learn how to apply the concepts of proactively planning and using your time. Take the Time Management Analysis (TMA), the Retirement Time Analysis (RTA), or all the other free resources offered to help bring more quality time into your life.

The post Time Flying Does Not Mean Better Time first appeared on Infinity Lifestyle Design.

David Buck Time Strategist

In 35+ years of business development, David developed a strong awareness of what it took for people to be productive and efficient, not just busy. He also personally sought to gain a balance of having a successful career along with the ability to pursue a meaningful personal life.

That led David to start Kairos Management Solutions, focusing all his attention to guide business professionals who struggle with a lack of flexibility in their life to gain more quality personal time. David helps others craft a strategy around their current management of time, and then define a lifestyle of intention, ease, and joy.

In 2024, David released two books, the first being The Time Optimized Life. The book reframes the reactive nature of time management and replaces it with a proactive method of time optimization. In addition, he co-authored The Retirement Collective, where he highlights and provides solutions for how to maximize the use of time for people in post-career life.