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Chris Rodell

High time we put a woman on the moon

 It’s been 62 years since JFK historically announced his intention that the US would put a man on the moon before the end of the decade.His inspiration succeeded. And since the first one did so in 1969, we’ve put 11 more of them up there on the lunar surface.I’ll bet you can only name the […]

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I shaved my head and beard, why?

  I woke up the other day with a wild hair up my ass that went clear to my brain and now the wild one is about the only hair I have left.I shaved my head and now I’m bald as a baby, albeit a baby with chest hair and pubes.It’s not uncommon for empathic souls […]

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Tweets of the New Year!

 I’d like to grant doctors the power to evaluate patients so that we’d hear more diagnoses like: “Well, the good news is the  operation was a success. You’re going to be fine. The bad news is unless you cut back on the volume and partisan stridency of all your non-stop political talk, everyone’s gonna think […]

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Tin Lizzy now has a free pool table!

 (1237 words)Nobody asked me and I’m not sure what I would’ve said, but they went and put a snazzy pool table in the 3rd floor rec room in the Tin Lizzy. It’s just 15 steps from the desk where I spend so much time trying to concentrate so I can maybe earn a living.Its pull […]

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State trooper pulls me over — in my driveway!

 I saw one head peeking out the window — and it was just a quick peek, like if it had lingered for too long it might have drawn gun fire. A Pennsylvania state trooper had pulled over a dilapidated vehicle with a shifty looking motorist and it was all going down in our driveway. This […]

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Socrates speaks: Best tweets of 2023

 I’ve been compiling these best-of lists for like 15 years now and no one not once has ever said, man, am I glad you take the time to list all those tweets ’cause I read every one of ’em.But they’re useful to me to have them all in one place.’cause you never know when someone’s […]

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They’ll always be “Tweets” of the month to me

 • That I can’t recall ever having spent any quality time at a popsicle stand, yet have blown hundreds of them, leads me to believe I have some serious commitment issues. • The Irish word “bejesus” is a mildly profane expression of surprise and is not to be confused with “Bee Jesus,” the latter referring to […]

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Biting the hand that feeds me

 I don’t know if it’s a latent burst of proper manners or just another condition of my condition, but in the last five or so years nothing infuriates me more than a cold rejection of my offers of good cheer.It happens anytime I reach out with simple humanity to a stranger and my gesture is […]

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