Episode 109: ⁠⁠Ernest Ellender, PhD ⁠⁠& (a) His Book, ⁠⁠This Is How We Heal from Painful Childhoods: A Practical Guide for Healing Past Intergenerational Stress and Trauma⁠⁠ & ⁠⁠(b) Up From Slavery by Booker T. Washington

ABOUT ERNEST

Ernest Ellender worked in the fields of psychology, life Coaching, and martial arts for over 25 years before authoring his first book entitled “This Is How We Heal from Painful Childhoods: A Practical Guide for Healing Past Intergenerational Stress and Trauma.” His advanced martial arts training combined with his doctorate in clinical psychology to produce his effective skills-building curriculum for healing past childhood traumas and family dysfunction. Ernest was raised in Louisiana’s Cajun communities that celebrate family life and a close connection to nature, and he spends his free time enjoying the wonderful Cajun cuisine, marshlands, beaches, and local microbreweries of south Louisiana with his family and friends.

CONVERSATION HIGHLIGHTS

• What a little bit of mischief and thrill-seeking in youth can mean for adulthood and career later.
• Going from general practitioner to finding your niche.
• Where the overlap exists between martial arts and psychology.
• Being aggressive in a good way.
• Examples of generational trauma vs. generational desire to help the community.
• How Sylvester Stallone, Charles Bronson, and Chuck Norris led Ernest to the work he’s doing now.
• What you find in the MRI Images associated with childhood trauma.
• Playing as an adult is essentially diving into the mud of life.
• “Healing requires training, Education, empathy for all.”
• The power of healing in human connectivity.
• Even coaches, therapists, and doctors needs to take their own medicine.
• “Anger begets anger, violence begets violence, and love begets love.”
• The dignity of work.

The MAIN QUESTION underlying my conversation with Ernest is, What does your intentional
process and practice for healing look like?

FIND ERNEST

• Website: www.ernestellenderphd.com
• LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/coach-ernest-ellender
• Ernest’s Book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CXJ5C4NB

LinkedIn – Full Podcast Article: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/episode-109-ernest-ellender-phd-his-book-how-we-heal-john-m–iibdf/?trackingId=mbJaytKBQ7aLHNjQMO0UXg%3D%3D

CHAPTERS

00:00 – The Book Leads Podcast

00:53 – Introduction & Bio – Ernest Ellender

02:27 – Who are you today? Can you provide more information about your work?

05:57 – Ernest’s life coaching specialization.

07:48 – The connection between martial arts and psychology. (More at 39:00)

10:42 – What “respectful aggression” means.

16:53 – How did your path into your career look like, and what did it look like up until now?

26:45 – What draws Ernest to the field of trauma and family dysfunction.

41:12 – How does the work you’re doing today reconcile to who you were as a child?

43:34 – What does leadership mean to you?

45:05 – Can you introduce us to the book we’re discussing?

45:47 – Can you provide a general overview of the book (Ernest’s Book)?

47:34  – What made Ernest write his book.

50:20 – An overview and breakdown of the chapters in the book.

01:18:43 – What evolved in you in the process of writing the book?

01:28:45 – What’s next for your writing?

01:30:16 – An overview of Booker T. Washington’s book and why Ernest chose to discuss that book as well.

01:46:13 – The lessons readers can take from Booker T. Washington’s book.

01:57:03 – What are you up to these days? (A way for guests to share and market their projects and work.)

This series has become my Masterclass In Humanity. I’d love for you to join me and see what you take away from these conversations.

Learn more about The Book Leads and listen to past episodes:

• Watch on YouTube
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• Listen on Apple Podcasts
• Read About The Book Leads – Blog Post

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John M. Jaramillo Leadership Performance Coach

John M. Jaramillo is founder and leadership performance coach and consultant at Coach It Out, LLC.

In that capacity he helps clients throughout the organizational hierarchy break through to their next level of leadership performance and effectiveness. Clients realize just how much more of their abilities, experiences, and goals they can bring to the table. His professional experience in the public and private, profit and non-profit sectors allows him to transfer lessons across business industries, organizational structures, and leadership needs.

In addition to coaching, he enjoys writing, presenting and speaking on leadership branding and design as well as hosting two podcasts -- The Book Leads: Impactful Books For Life & Leadership and Mindset Talks: Life Beyond The Checkboxes.