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Waking up with Anxiety. Every day.

I recently came to the awareness that I wake up every day in a state of panic.

OK panic might be on the strong side, so let’s say dread, anxiety.

I am not talking about a one off due to a presentation or a meeting but a standard everyday occurrence.

That is how I wake up. I then internally scan my mental horizon for causes of stress -and that can indeed be a big meeting etc. but can also just be, what will I do today or a gym class or anything really.

By the time I am up, it is gone.

I am shocked yet recognize that that is what I do. Every day. I find it even more confusing as I pride myself om my happy go lucky, positive outlook and strong inner foundation after years of personal development.

I seem, at some subconscious level, to feel deeply unsafe. Asked recently (in a totally different context) to describe a moment when I felt utterly safe: I struggled and to my consternation started crying. I still can’t get my head around it as I have no clear traumas or bad childhood memories that I know of. I decided to leave the WHY for now and focus on what I could change.

So, what DO you do at the young age of 56 to start creating that feeling of safety? I am surrounded by a loving family, partner, and friends. I have a roof over my head and with age have learnt to more or less own all that makes me the wonderfully imperfect being I am.

Which leaves us money. My bank account empties and fills depending on the clients I have and the trips I plan, and I have always sort of prided myself on not being interested in money. Yet money too is security, especially when one is freelance, without a pension or savings.

Money certainly does not guarantee happiness or fulfillment, but it does create options and it does create independence.

So, for now I am embarked (via the educational platform of the online business I am now affiliated with) on a journey of befriending money, of seeing its beauty, it’s worth as a force for good. Of seeing myself as worthy of receiving, holding, and circulating money so I can fully embrace the freedom business model we operate with.

Should any of this resonate with you, reach out and together let’s do something about it.

You DESERVE (to) #beheard #behealthy #befree

The post Waking up with Anxiety. Every day. appeared first on The Kennedy Connection.

Originally British, brought up in France and currently living in the Netherlands after having worked and lived in various countries around the world, I am passionate about helping my clients be heard. I call myself a 'Projector' as I enhance and boost their message, to themselves via coaching and to others via also improvements to their English content via writing, editing and translating (from Dutch and French into English). I host " Fabulous after Fifty" a podcast and YouTube channel dedicated to helping my listeners make the most of these years ahead, changing what needs to be changed and embracing the rest. If not now, when? The world is ours, time to shine, live to our full capacity while making the world a better place, one person at a time.

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Julie Kennedy
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