There is no “if” in dying – only “when.” Yet we act like (and/or pretend) we will live forever.

We make no advance directive and assign no power of attorney or durable medical power of attorney. We don’t tell others our thoughts or wants regarding the ending of our lives. We don’t prepare others close to us for what to do or how to manage our affairs when we are gone.

“Big mistake,” as Julia Roberts said in the movie Pretty Woman. By not writing out our end of life wishes, organizing our material affairs, or talking to those involved, we are putting ourselves and those close to us in the hands, minds, and wishes of others. Others that may not have even known us, let alone know what we would have wanted done with our healthcare or our finances.

Filling out an advance directive is as simple as going to Google and putting in “advance directives.” There are many sites that are free. Fill one out, download, and print. Or better yet just print it and then fill it out. The form doesn’t have to be notarized, but I would anyway. 

Talk with your family and significant others about your wishes. Talk to your physician and give her/ him a copy so they will know your intentions. If you don’t share your wishes with them, they will be the ones making important decisions about how you live and how you die.

I work with end of life situations. I see what can happen when a person has not shared their medical and financial wishes with others. HOWEVER, it isn’t just a diagnosis of a life threatening illness that warrants these directives. We are all going to die someday, either suddenly (accident, heart attack or Stroke) or gradually (old age or illness). None of us really know when death will come knocking at our door. Protect yourself and those you care about by having an advance directive, a power of attorney and a medical power of attorney.

Something More… about None of Us Really Know When Death Will Come

My guidebook, BY YOUR SIDE, will be helpful if you are caring for someone who is approachiing the end of their life. This 72 page, spiral-bound guidebook addresses:

• end of life choices (life sustaining, comfort care)
• advance directives
• funeral planning
• details signs of approaching death (what to look for, what to do)
• describes end of life care at home
• pain management
• care of dementia patients at end of life

Originally Published on https://bkbooks.com/blogs/something-to-think-about

Barbara Karnes Registered Nurse

Barbara Karnes, RN Award Winning End of Life Educator, Award Winning Nurse, NHPCO Hospice Innovator Award Winner 2018 & 2015 International Humanitarian Woman of the Year

While at the bedside of hundreds of people during the dying process, Hospice Pioneer Barbara Karnes noticed that each death was following a near identical script. Each person was going through the stages of death in almost the same manner and most families came to her with similar questions. These realizations led Barbara to sit down and write Gone From My Sight, "The Little Blue Book" that changed the hospice industry.