Dear Barbara, As a new hospice RN, I would like to thank you for your contribution to hospice. Your booklet Gone From My Sight was so touching to read and gives my patients’ families so much comfort. I am sure you are a very busy woman, but if you have any advice for a new […]
Dear Barbara, I lost my mom to cancer. I had taken 2 months off work to be at her home. I have lost my way since her dying. Lost my job, home, family, friends. I am struggling as I write. Why is this still the core of my downfall. I saw my alcoholic dad to […]
I have always been on the taking-care-of-people side of healthcare. Recently, my role switched and I found myself on the being-taken-care-of side. (Not to worry, I am fine now. My broken ankle is healing.) I think the biggest challenge I had as a patient was not being seen as more than a physical problem needing […]
I remember my mother sitting in a hospital gown on the end of an examining table, listening to her oncologist explain her lung cancer. She was smiling and nodding her head as if she understood what he was saying. I was standing off to the side, and I didn’t understand him — and I have […]
Dear Barbara, My 87 year old father has cancer and about six months to live. He will not tell his wife (my mother) or my sister who lives close by and helps them out. He has made me promise not to tell. I live far away. How can I help all of them? How can […]
The hours to minutes before death are some of the most important moments we will ever experience with another person. Yet most people are not prepared for what to do, what to say, or even what is okay to do in those final hours. Everything hospice and end of life doulas do leads up to […]
I was asked about a caregiver who was encouraging their special person to socialize with many visitors and to eat more. The hospice nurse’s teachings and suggestions about the dying process were either not heard, not understood, or perhaps being ignored. Not understanding how people die, and knowing that food and activity keep our bodies […]
FOOD! We celebrate with it. We cry over it. We socialize around it. We express our anger, nervousness, sadness, and aloneness through food. We eat for a lot of reasons, but really we eat to live—to keep our physical body healthy and strong. It is the nutrition food provides that keeps the body alive. If […]
Grief is a lot of emotions rolled into one package. Some days feel manageable. Other days, everything falls apart. If you have ever wondered why grief feels so overwhelming, this is why. Visualize a table in front of an open window. There are stacks of paper on the table. Tidy, organized stacks. A slight breeze […]
I think a great disservice is done when physicians put an actual number on how long a person has to live. We cannot be that specific. We cannot know six months, one year, or any exact number. The closest we can come is to generally advise whether someone is in the ballpark of years, months, […]
