I’ve spent my whole career helping people change. Someone walks into my Therapy office stuck in a pattern they don’t want, and together we figure out how to get them unstuck. I’ve written books about it. This whole podcast is about it.
But after almost 25 years as a therapist, here’s what strikes me: how much we actually stay the same. The things that made you light up at 5 are probably the same things that light you up at 55. The impulses you had at 7 are still there at 47. We change in real ways—but underneath, something steady keeps us being us.
Today’s episode is a little different. Instead of a mental strength play to change your life, I want to talk about the parts of you that were never going to change—and why that might be one of the more beautiful things about being a person. We live in a world constantly telling you to become a new version of yourself. But sometimes there’s no problem to fix. Sometimes it just means there’s a reliable part of you that’s been there all along.
Some of the things I talk about are:
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