Everyone is different, and we show a variety of personalities when we are toddlers. Children can be aggressive (grab a toy from another child), passive (shy and cling to parent), or even-tempered but can demonstrate both behaviors at different times. This is normal behavior for babies. How adults teach children to handle aggressive and passive behaviors determines a child’s future.

I have three children; each was different but demonstrated their future behavior if not addressed. My first child was so shy and sensitive and would cling to me when she met someone or in a new environment. My second child was friendly and assertive. She was outgoing but tended to grab what she wanted and cry if she didn’t get her way. My third child was even-tempered and accepted most situations. As the children grew, I saw a variety of insecurities that needed to be addressed.

To help my first child get over being shy, I got her into various groups, including dance classes at age three, preschool, and church activities, which helped her gain confidence.

When my second daughter was three, she aggressively bullied her older sister. I had to take them to the doctor once because she scratched her sister’s eye cornea. She didn’t stop her aggressive behavior until I spanked her three different times. The lesson was, I’m not happy, and you must stop your bullying behavior now. She needed to know the people who loved her would not tolerate bullying. She learned self-control and got praise for good behavior.  

My son was in first grade when he came home crying. A classmate was calling him names and punching him. He refused to go back to school. Superman was the hero of the day. I explained that Clark Kent was a mild-mannered reporter who became strong wearing his Superman costume. He could bounce bullets off his chest. I told my son he needed to bounce “word” bullets off his chest. I explained that crying made him more vulnerable. It took several discussions before he learned that he had to develop his inner strength and speak up without anger to his bully. Two weeks later, he came home excited and stated he had taken care of the bully. What did you do? I asked. He said triumphantly, I told him to stop, or I would punch him in the nose. When he didn’t stop, I punched him and told my teacher. Now he leaves me alone, he grinned.

Children must learn how to solve problems early to gain self-esteem and self-confidence. Parents should only jump in if the situation is dangerous. Children need support to learn lessons at an early age. Confident teens may not engage in risky behaviors to escape from themselves. It is critical to empower youth so they know they cannot rely on someone else. It is their life to live confidently and develop faith in themselves to prevent being manipulated or controlled by unscrupulous people on the internet. Today, my three children live successful and productive lives.

I am now a grandmother with eight fantastic grandchildren, and I share many stories and lessons with parents in two books. They have been translated into Chinese for kids at risk in Taiwan.

For more information, join us on our mission to empower youth:  Safekidsnow.com.

Part Two: Stop “Adult” Bullies and Strengthen America

The post Stop Bullies and Strengthen America! Part One appeared first on Safe Kids Now Network.

Originally Published on https://safekidsnow.com/

Stephanie Mann Author, Crime and Violence Prevention Consultant

Author, Crime and Violence Prevention Consultant – 40 years

Founder/ExecDirector: Safe Kids Now – National Network to strengthen families, neighborhoods, and communities.

Author: 5 Prevention books on home, neighborhood, and city-wide safety.

Stephanie Authored "Alternatives to Fear: Guidelines to Safer Neighborhoods," which helped launch the National "Neighborhood Watch" program.

"Safe Homes Safe Neighborhoods: Stopping Crime Where You Live"
"The Adopt-a-Block Guidebook, "My first steps to a safe neighborhood," and "A Safe Neighborhoods Program Binder for City Leaders"

Latest books, "Empowerment Parenting: How to raise resilient children who become happy, self-reliant adults," empowers parents to help children develop the 3C's: Courage, Character, and a self-protective Conscience so they make good choices for their future. New book soon, "Magical YOU: Empowering Teens to Stay Safe and Healthy in an Unsafe World."

Hosted a national and international TV/Radio program from NY, "The Safe Kids Now Show," on aaumedia.com -

For more information, www.safekidsnow.com.