Richard F. Carter: The Octogenarian Who Roasted the Golden Years
Before TikTok seniors were dancing their way into virality, Richard F. Carter was cracking jokes about hearing aids and hemorrhoids on national television. A WWII bomber pilot turned newspaper artist turned stand-up comic, Carter didn’t just defy expectations — he mocked them with punchlines.
 From POW to LOL
After surviving being shot down over Germany and spending time as a prisoner of war, Carter returned home, raised a Family, and worked for over three decades as a graphic artist at the Deseret News. But Retirement didn’t mean retreat. At 62, he took to the stage — not to reminisce, but to roast the very idea of growing old gracefully.
“I always drive with my turn-signal on since the honking from other drivers keeps me awake.”
 The Golden Years Are a Crock
His book, The Golden Years Are a Crock, is a 75-page manifesto of geriatric rebellion. Illustrated by fellow cartoonist Calvin Grondahl, it’s packed with one-liners that would make your grandpa blush — and then steal the joke.
“I have a large following of groupies. They are called morticians.”
“Hearing aids? I don’t wear ’em. Six-hundred-fifty bucks for those things — there isn’t anything anybody can tell me, that I don’t already know, that’s worth $650.”
“I’m not saying I’m old, but my social calendar is mostly doctor appointments and prescription refills.”
 Comedy Clubs and Cable TV
Carter performed in Las Vegas hotels like the Riviera and Maxim’s, and appeared on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and Evening at the Improv. His act was clean but biting, a masterclass in self-deprecation and observational humor from the senior section.
He didn’t just joke about Aging — he weaponized it.
“My idea of Exercise is getting up twice during the night to pee.”
 A Legacy of Laughs
Carter passed away in 2011 at age 91, having lived a life that was anything but quiet. No funeral was planned — a final wink from a man who preferred punchlines to eulogies.
 Why He Belongs on Old and in the Way
Richard F. Carter is the spiritual godfather of our podcast — proof that age isn’t a punchline, it’s a setup. His story reminds us that it’s never too late to take the mic, tell the truth, and make people laugh until they snort Ensure.
Want to hear more stories like Carter’s? Subscribe, share, and stay tuned — because the golden years might be a crock, but they’re also comedy gold.
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