Most of us don’t listen to understand – we listen to respond, fix, or reassure.

In this episode, Sabrina sits down with Dr. Randall Alifano, a clinical psychologist and ordained minister with over 40 years of experience integrating psychology and spirituality in his private practice. Randall is the author of Listening in the Raw: Coming Home to Receptivity, and has spent his career helping people recognize that life’s challenges and our childhood responses to Trauma and neglect aren’t pathologies to fix – they’re coping strategies to become aware of.

In this conversation, Sabrina and Randall explore listening not as a social skill but as a personal discipline – what it really means to quiet your internal noise and stay present with discomfort, uncertainty, and someone else’s emotion, without rushing to smooth it over.

In this episode, you’ll hear:

• Why most people listen to respond, fix, or reassure – and how that habit quietly erodes Intimacy and self-awareness.
• The difference between treating life’s challenges as pathologies versus recognizing them as coping strategies.
• What decades of clinical work have taught Randall about what happens when we truly quiet our internal noise.
• How staying present with discomfort and uncertainty – rather than resolving it – changes a conversation.
• Why real listening is a discipline you practice, not a trait you either have or don’t.
• How this quality of listening opens the door to becoming more attuned to who you actually are.

If you’ve ever caught yourself half-listening while planning what to say next, this episode is a chance to see what changes when you stop.

Find out more about this week’s guest: https://randallalifanophd.com

Breen Time is hosted by Sabrina Brown – life coach and management consultant.

New episodes every Monday – listen now wherever you get your podcasts.

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If this episode raised something for you, support is available: Counselling Directory: https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk Samaritans: https://www.samaritans.org Mind: https://www.mind.org.uk NHS Mental Health & Talking Therapies: https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/talking-therapies-medicine-treatments/talking-therapies-and-counselling/nhs-talking-therapies/

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Sabrina Brown The BreenTime Podcast

I’m someone who’s always loved learning, growing, and helping people navigate change. Over the years, I’ve built a career leading transformation and strategy work across healthcare and the public sector, but at heart I’m simply passionate about making a positive difference and supporting people to reach their potential.
I’m a proud mum to one daughter, and family means everything to me. I love travelling, keeping fit, meeting new people, and having meaningful conversations that inspire fresh ideas and new perspectives. I’m also passionate about coaching and personal development, and I’m always curious about what helps people grow and thrive.
Through my podcast and being part of this community, I hope to share real conversations, encouragement, and a reminder that it’s never too late to embrace change, try something new, and keep creating a life you love.