By Jerry Zezima As a man of many words, not all of which can be used in a family newspaper, I am delighted to announce that our special guest today is Prof. Ludwig Lingo, the noted linguistics expert and an ardent fighter of crimes against the English language. JZ: Welcome, Prof. Lingo. What’s the good […]
By Jerry Zezima Something fishy is going on in my family. And it involves, for approximately the hundredth time, a dead fish. The latest fine finny friend to go belly-up was Igor, a blue boy betta who belonged to two of my granddaughters, which made him, I guess, my grandfish. But not to worry: There’s […]
By Jerry Zezima I’m the very model of the modern marching man. And I am determined to put one foot in front of the other until I walk headlong into a wall. But I can’t say the same for the vast majority of walkers who don’t seem to know where they are going, usually while […]
By Jerry Zezima With apologies to Mick Jagger, my kidneys have produced more rolling stones than he’s ever had. That’s why I got satisfaction from a radiology report showing that my career as a rock star could mercifully be over. On orders from my urologist, who must feel like a miner because he has excavated […]
By Jerry Zezima I’m a guy who likes to travel the world. Unfortunately, I can do so only if I sit in front of the TV and watch celebrities like Stanley Tucci eat and drink their way through Italy and other exotic lands while the most thrilling places I visit are Home Depot and Costco. […]
By Jerry Zezima I live in a wasp neighborhood. At least that’s the buzz from a couple of exterminators who came over on separate occasions to rid the house and property of all the pests that creep my wife out. Sue, who says I’m the biggest pest of all, routinely roams the premises with a […]
By Jerry Zezima I live in a wasp neighborhood. At least that’s the buzz from a couple of exterminators who came over on separate occasions to rid the house and property of all the pests that creep my wife out. Sue, who says I’m the biggest pest of all, routinely roams the premises with a […]
By Jerry Zezima I live in a wasp neighborhood. At least that’s the buzz from a couple of exterminators who came over on separate occasions to rid the house and property of all the pests that creep my wife out. Sue, who says I’m the biggest pest of all, routinely roams the premises with a […]
By Jerry Zezima If Alexander Graham Bell, who is credited with patenting the first telephone, were alive today, he’d be: (a) On hold. (b) Getting relentless calls about his car’s extended warranty. (c) Convinced that my new smartphone has a dumb owner. The correct answer is: (d) All of the above. At least Bell has […]
By Jerry Zezima When you break a tooth that you’ve already had a root canal on, you root for your dentist to get to the root of the problem. That’s what Dr. Anthony Fazio did on one of my molars, which he expertly repaired during a two-part procedure that was, I am happy to report, […]
