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What if the fight you keep having with your spouse isn't really about dishes, Money, or who said what last Tuesday? What if the two of you aren't even fighting each other at all?In this solo…

What if the fight yo…

What if the fight you keep having with your spouse isn't really about dishes, money, or who said what last Tuesday? What if the two of you aren't even fighting each other at all?In this solo episode, Todd Creager — licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and relationship coach with over 30 years of experience working with couples — walks you through a framework he uses with couples every day: the three internal parts that show up in virtually every relationship conflict. Once you can see them, the whole fight starts to make sense.Todd breaks down the Firefighter — the part that …

What if the thing you've been doing to fix your relationship is actually what's keeping it stuck?Most couples hit a wall. You've read the books, planned the date nights, promised to lis…

What if the thing yo…

What if the thing you've been doing to fix your relationship is actually what's keeping it stuck?Most couples hit a wall. You've read the books, planned the date nights, promised to listen better — and somehow you're still in the same spot. More exhausted, more frustrated, and further apart than before. If that sounds familiar, this episode is for you.In this solo episode, Todd Creager — licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over 30 years working with couples — explains why trying harder rarely works, and what's actually happening beneath the surface when y…

What if the thing getting in the way of your sex life isn't a physical problem — it's a protective one?In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager takes a can…

What if the thing ge…

What if the thing getting in the way of your sex life isn't a physical problem — it's a protective one?In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager takes a candid, grounded look at what happens when your inner critic shows up in the bedroom. Whether it sounds like Am I good enough? Is my partner enjoying this? or it shows up as numbness, avoidance, or a total loss of desire — Todd explains that these aren't failures. They're protective responses doing a job.Using Internal Family Systems (IFS), Todd breaks down two types of protective parts t…

Is jealousy making you feel out of control — or controlling? Before you try to talk yourself out of it, it's worth understanding what it's actually doing for you.In this solo episode, lice…

Is jealousy making y…

Is jealousy making you feel out of control — or controlling? Before you try to talk yourself out of it, it's worth understanding what it's actually doing for you.In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager takes an honest, compassionate look at jealousy — not as a character flaw or a red flag, but as a protective response rooted in older, unhealed pain. If your partner mentions a coworker and your chest tightens, or a liked photo on social media sends your mind into overdrive, this episode speaks directly to what's happening beneath that reactio…

Do you go blank, get quiet, or feel like you've completely left your body the moment conflict shows up in your relationship? There's a reason that happens — and it has nothing to do with n…

Do you go blank, get…

Do you go blank, get quiet, or feel like you've completely left your body the moment conflict shows up in your relationship? There's a reason that happens — and it has nothing to do with not caring.In this solo episode, Todd digs into one of the most misunderstood patterns in long-term relationships: shutting down during conflict. Whether you go still and silent or reach for your phone, the fridge, or anything else to escape the moment, Todd explains what's actually driving that response — and why blaming yourself or your partner for it keeps you stuck.Drawing from his 30+ y…

What does cheating actually do to the person doing it?Most conversations about infidelity focus on the betrayed partner — and for good reason. But in this episode, Todd Creager turns the lens inward…

What does cheating a…

What does cheating actually do to the person doing it?Most conversations about infidelity focus on the betrayed partner — and for good reason. But in this episode, Todd Creager turns the lens inward, looking at what happens inside the body and mind of the person having the affair. It's part of his ongoing series on how cheating cheats the cheater, and this episode zeroes in on something rarely talked about: the physiological cost of living a secret.Using the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS), Todd walks through how our protective parts operate when deep wounds go unaddressed. The "f…

Have you ever wondered why someone who's having an affair can still feel profoundly alone?In this episode, Todd Creager continues his series on how cheating cheats the cheater — and this time h…

Have you ever wonder…

Have you ever wondered why someone who's having an affair can still feel profoundly alone?In this episode, Todd Creager continues his series on how cheating cheats the cheater — and this time he looks at one of the deepest costs of infidelity: the loss of authentic Intimacy. Using the Internal Family Systems (IFS) framework, Todd explains why keeping a secret doesn't just strain a relationship. It cuts the person having the affair off from the one thing that actually heals loneliness — being truly known.At the heart of IFS is a simple but important idea: we are all made of parts.…

What if the person most harmed by an affair isn't the one who was betrayed — but the one who did the betraying?In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager returns …

What if the person m…

What if the person most harmed by an affair isn't the one who was betrayed — but the one who did the betraying?In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager returns to one of his most talked-about topics: the psychological cost of infidelity to the person who cheats. Drawing on over 30 years of working with couples, and through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy, Todd breaks down why cheating is so often less about desire and more about escape — and what that escape actually costs.At the center of this conversation is the IFS concept of "self…

What happens between you and your partner in bed may have less to do with technique and more to do with how you're wired for connection.In this solo episode, Todd Creager — licensed Marriage an…

What happens between…

What happens between you and your partner in bed may have less to do with technique and more to do with how you're wired for connection.In this solo episode, Todd Creager — licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over 30 years of experience working with couples — breaks down the four attachment styles and what they look like during sex and physical intimacy. Most people have heard of the four attachment categories: secure, anxious (fearful), avoidant, and fearful-avoidant. But Todd draws an important distinction that changes how you think about all of it: you're not just one …

What if the part of you that shuts down sexually — or the part that keeps reaching for porn — isn't a character flaw? What if it's trying to protect you?In this solo episode, licensed Ma…

What if the part of …

What if the part of you that shuts down sexually — or the part that keeps reaching for porn — isn't a character flaw? What if it's trying to protect you?In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager explains why forcing your way through sexual performance Anxiety — or trying to stop compulsive sexual behavior through sheer willpower — almost always backfires. Drawing from two therapeutic approaches he uses in his practice, Internal Family Systems (IFS) and EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), Todd walks through what's actually…

If you've discovered a partner's affair and wondered why the pain feels like it might actually kill you, you're not overreacting. In this episode, Todd explains exactly why betrayal tra…

If you've disco…

If you've discovered a partner's affair and wondered why the pain feels like it might actually kill you, you're not overreacting. In this episode, Todd explains exactly why betrayal trauma hits so deep — and what healing actually looks like.When an affair comes to light, the shock is real and the cause is clear. But what makes it feel so all-consuming is that it often wakes up something much older — the wounded parts of you that have been quietly buried since childhood. Feelings of not being good enough. Of being abandoned. Of not being safe. The present pain and the past pa…

Do you and your partner keep circling the same argument, no matter how many times you've tried to resolve it? The problem might not be what either of you is saying — it might be who is actually…

Do you and your part…

Do you and your partner keep circling the same argument, no matter how many times you've tried to resolve it? The problem might not be what either of you is saying — it might be who is actually doing the talking.In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager introduces a concept from Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy that helps explain why so many couples get stuck in what he calls the "bickering loop." According to IFS, we all carry protective parts — internal responses shaped by our past wounds — and when those protectors take over during conflict, t…