A female cardinal and her sweet pale red mate, persistently build a nest over our outdoor speakers. Four speakers with the perfect pitch to build a home. My husband is at war with these two tan-red beings. North, South, East, West, they won’t give up, rotating their nest around our new-ish backyard, swatted away by a broom handle or long limb of Jon’s.
I no longer chase my cardinal couple away, letting them stay longer. They are bringing something I’ve craved for a long time; a nest within my home.
I know something is different about this cardinal couple, barely red at all. They are hustling around our backwoods, gathering. They are hopeful, often traveling together, communicating through high pitched chirps that remind me of my ringtone. (Apple got that cardinal alarm sound really right!).
They are at home, in my home.
Just like the women who went to Woodloch Lodge, the first weekend in June, to see , we need a place to lay our heads for a minute.
What I know, more than ever, is I Love having moments of Clarity (so do my clients). In the workshop during the last few hours of our stay, walked us through—feeling overwhelmed, dealing with lows and resets, relocating, being ‘on’ all of the time as a mother. We all nodded because we all wanted
Although my mind feels 24, my nervous system has memories that are 50. It’s been 4 years since I left Wall Street, managed the death of my Father in Law (yes, managed), had 2 of my own surgeries, helped my girls right-side a few scholastic and sports drama, & survived the mental fuckery of the DRs telling my Dad he should not be alive after his heart attack and random things along the way.
Christina and I congratulated ourselves for long days, hard weeks and now sometimes bored at work.
These sweet birds stay, and return, creating a twiggy nest, both of them returning over and over. I am these nesters, returning to me again and again. The evolving nest, now stretching towards the roofline, is never ending. Like me in my 20s, these birds think “When I Get “Here”, I’ll be Perfect.”
Women crave clarity & purpose after giving so much to creating that nest for our kids, Family, spouses, colleagues.
So I reset every season, like turning 50 in November. To find CLARITY in midlife, I ask myself (and my clients):
What are my current core values?
Who do I want to help in my business?
Who needs my help (at home)?
What is my priority for myself & the outer world?
What is next— literally today, in the next hour?
What is the next phase in my life, career, Marriage?
How can I find peace to hear clarity?
At Woodloch, with one of my oldest friends, I was able to R E S T. Long sleeps, deep meditations, long warrior 2s, dinners that require dessert. On this 50th year weekend away, planned 6 months beforehand, my friend and I contemplated turning 50.
“I don’t feel 50”, “Do we look 50?” “I am ready to slow down, the next phase is in reach.” We reviewed spousal squabbles, managing teen girls, and sadly how we’ve moved away from some former college friendships.
Kristin’s community, (we all shared numbers and emails!), felt called to reinvent themselves in their 50s. Brene Brown first gave me the vocab word, ‘permission’ , to use for myself.
financial abundance & less hustle
having fun & less restrictions on my body
saying no & trying new things
letting go of friends that are takers & making new ones like in a Sunday Circle at Woodloch
no longer grabbing for things & still finding ambition
permission to laugh, take the weekend away & also want to get home to hugs and messy kitchens
I’ve done 1,000 of Yoga poses over the years. Every time I learn a new adjustment & every time I get on my mat I still can’t do crow. I no longer care.
I’m still growing, shedding and loving my life. Feeling seen by Kristin, my first yoga teacher in NYC, as an evolved formerly stressed out 24×7 Finance girlie to a reiki master and coach, was what the Doctor ordered.
Before you go…
✨ Craving Clarity, you might love this article to find a new term “working mom” as a title
💬 Craving clarity, treat yourself to a 1:1 session. Try a 30 minute energy session as a starting place.
🎧 Have you done my latest Visualization Vault? under 10 mins to cut cords of shitty friends.
