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Why me?


Instead of why NOT me?


Yikes!  Does that distinction come out of that place where we feel victimized or that we should somehow not suffer?  No one wants to.  No one wants cancer, or to lose a limb, or a dog.  We want our life to be easy. But let’s think about this a little bit differently.  When we say, “why me?” 

We’re not focusing on what is actually happening.  We are focusing on ourselves.  Instead of:

Why this? 

Why an accident?

Why cancer?

Why rejection?


We’re upset that we will struggle, that we are screwed over in our mind.   Our focus is


Why do I have to go through this?


And by saying, “why me?”, we are kind of inferring that it would be okay for it to be somebody else.  Or at least us.  When I say that out loud, that sounds really ugly. I don’t wish ill will on anyone.


I heard of a gentleman who had been in a horrible accident, and he said “why not me?”

Why not me? Wow! 

My brain doesn’t think this way.

Yet. My brain doesn’t think that anything that can come my way IS to come my way and for me to willingly receive it.


I know this is the truth in Word, but in action, I don’t come through.  I whine.  I cry.  I complain.  I want pity.

I don’t know how much that man rustled in this, but I didn’t hear it.  When I heard him say, “Why not me? “ A really beautiful reality in the way he views humanity opened up for me.  He is equal to all others AND he wishes better for them.


He wishes better for others.  He has a really beautiful way in how he views life, a really beautiful way that he believes in Spirit, and he touched my soul.

Why not me?

Why not?

Do you struggle here?


I wish for you not to suffer.

Massive hugs and humbleness!


All my love!



Dr. Heather Browne PsyD, LMFT helps people recognize the power of communication.  It is one of our most important skills that we have, and yet we don’t consider our understanding, approach, belief, and therefore, miss our possibilities.  Living with a paranoid schizophrenic mother gave Dr. Heather a unique and powerful awareness that no one has the same reality, though we believe we do.  Utilizing this revolutionary awareness has allowed her to transform communication within self and within all other types of relationship.  This is the hidden key to acceptance.  And this is her mission to share.

As a relationship expert, Dr. Heather Browne has worked with thousands of individuals and couples in psychotherapy.  She is a TedX Speaker and Keynote Speaker. Her couple’s communication book will be out 1/24. She is published in hundreds of journals, has an active YouTube channel, has been featured on ABC-7 news, was the relationship expert on KDOC Daybreak OC, and is published in Inc., Toronto Sun, Thriving Family Magazine,  Light + Life, BRAINZ, Scary Mommy, and Psychology Today.  She is a regular guest blogger for both Links for Shrinks and for Marriage Friendly Therapists. She offers a weekly newsletter packed with tips and techniques to improve relationships and has monthly workshops! Simply go to her website!

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Heather Browne
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