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My Sister Died, Sending Her Off

 

My sister died. We think of complications with Alzheimer’s.

She was the last holder of my key to our childhood memories. The last who deeply knew my Mom. I am now the oldest and only of my childhood family. I was the baby. Flip flop see saw. It’s bizarre to be THE oldest generation especially when right now all I want is to be a kid running at the beach with my Mom, my Dad, and my Sis.

I did something yesterday. Don’t tell my surgeon. I disobeyed his orders and completely covered my cast and went on the beach. I needed to honor my sister. And I needed to be at our childhood favorite place. Where my Mom and Dad’s ashes rest. And I wanted to be there and feel my childhood family all together once more. It’s been 44 years. I felt them all. And Mom and Dad were delighted to welcome her, taking her out of her struggle.

As I struggled here.

It’s such a weird thing, being left. Being the last one standing. Or in my case mandala’ing. Thank God I have my kids!

Sienna/Shek and I created her a glorious mandala with a horse, her favorite animal, riding her to Heaven. We sprinkled daisies all over it as the angels kissed her beautiful cheeks. And I sang Born Free. A song I sang at nursery school graduation which made my sister, Christi actually smile. It truly fit. She is now free. Praise God who’s wrapped her up into His arms.

I really love the art of mandala’ing someone as they pass. It feels so honoring and lovely. Decorating them their crown.

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZPREKBSd9/

Please pray for my niece and nephew, Matthew and Elizabeth. It’s so hard to lose your Mom. And pray for all those who have loved my sister.

What struck me this morning was my Mom’s mind split

My Dad lost his in dementia

And poor Christi was forgetting hers with Alzheimer’s.

And as I started to go down that slippery slope, my sweet glorious friend Diane dropped by with succulent plants (sturdy, strong, needing little water), helpful in case I forget! A gorgeous gift of CUT UP yes CUT UP fruit! Such a gift. And she tied me up in my swimsuit, pulled up my hair so today I can be a ton cooler. I live a little far from those cooling breezes of last night. And she hugged me deep.

I am so blessed! Thank you to each of you for your loving messages and support. I am touched by how caring you have been these rough past 6 weeks! Those who are far…you have blessed me with calls and texts. Angella you are a queen and Dianne and Kimmie! And my local angels Diane, Melody, Jill, Georgian, Heather, Kim, Janine, Wendy, Dan, Loriann, and of course, my babes, Sienna and Mac.

Hug on all those you love! Embrace them and heal your wounds if possible. Or hug on them in spite of wounds to cultivate love. And next time you see me, let’s share a deep deep hug! Promise! I could use one. And I bet, so could you?

I love you so!

 

 

Dr. Heather Browne PsyD, LMFT helps people recognize the power of communication.  It is one of our most important skills that we have, and yet we don’t consider our understanding, approach, belief, and therefore, miss our possibilities.  Living with a paranoid schizophrenic mother gave Dr. Heather a unique and powerful awareness that no one has the same reality, though we believe we do.  Utilizing this revolutionary awareness has allowed her to transform communication within self and within all other types of relationship.  This is the hidden key to acceptance.  And this is her mission to share.

As a relationship expert, Dr. Heather Browne has worked with thousands of individuals and couples in psychotherapy.  She is a TedX Speaker and Keynote Speaker. Her couple’s communication book will be out 1/24. She is published in hundreds of journals, has an active YouTube channel, has been featured on ABC-7 news, was the relationship expert on KDOC Daybreak OC, and is published in Inc., Toronto Sun, Thriving Family Magazine,  Light + Life, BRAINZ, Scary Mommy, and Psychology Today.  She is a regular guest blogger for both Links for Shrinks and for Marriage Friendly Therapists. She offers a weekly newsletter packed with tips and techniques to improve relationships and has monthly workshops! Simply go to her website!
https://www.drheatherbrowne.com/

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