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We wait. In the morning, in the evening, in the middle of the night we’re waiting. For what? The what doesn’t matter – what matters is the HOW. After John the Baptist was beheaded (Matthew…

We wait. In the morn…

We wait. In the morning, in the evening, in the middle of the night we’re waiting. For what? The what doesn’t matter – what matters is the HOW. After John the Baptist was beheaded (Matthew 14), Jesus went off to pray alone. When He came back He found more than 5000 hungry men, PLUS women and children. A now-familiar miracle followed – Jesus fed them. I really wonder if that miracle was for the disciples at least as much as the people – did they even realize? But the disciples knew – after all they were the ones who gathered the measly fishes and loaves. We’re not told ho…

WHEN I WORRY WorryingIs exhaustingAndIt wastes my timeIt steals my energyIt steals my focusAndAll I can see is me. When I’m staring at myselfAnd my mind isChewing on the wonderingAnd the fearO…

WHEN I WORRY Worr…

WHEN I WORRY WorryingIs exhaustingAndIt wastes my timeIt steals my energyIt steals my focusAndAll I can see is me. When I’m staring at myselfAnd my mind isChewing on the wonderingAnd the fearOf what the future might holdIs crippling meAndThere is pain nowThat seems endless. But do you know?Do you know that weOnly know what we knowAnd that what we’re chewing onIs probablyNOT the future. Do you know thatWe can knowWe should knowWe do knowThe real live Truth andIt will set you freeFrom everythingEven worry. Do you know whatYour future holds? I doAnd because I knowThat’s al…

This is invisible illness week, and my thoughts about it turned into these words. —— Every day I do my best To look ok So people don’t know I’m sick Except  I really n…

This is invisible il…

This is invisible illness week, and my thoughts about it turned into these words. —— Every day I do my best To look ok So people don’t know I’m sick Except  I really need some of them to know That I can barely move most mornings Because everything hurts  That my meds make me sick That my hair falls out That I can’t handle the heat That I have lesions In my brain On my spinal cord On my liver and  In my lungs Which means  My memory is bad and  My balance is terrible Among other things  That my immune system  …

Have you ever wondered if anyone sees you? Like, REALLY sees you? I have. To be honest, though, sometimes I’m simply feeling sorry for myself because we disagreed and so “you just don’t get me.�…

Have you ever wonder…

Have you ever wondered if anyone sees you? Like, REALLY sees you? I have. To be honest, though, sometimes I’m simply feeling sorry for myself because we disagreed and so “you just don’t get me.” But sometimes I feel the dagger go in, like when I’m misunderstood. Or betrayed. Or the victim of an undeserved attack. Two things can happen when I’m feeling this kind of pain – I shut down, and then I put up a wall. The “shut down” happens when I feel immediate danger, and the walls are for my ongoing protection. And sometimes that’s truly necessary. There will be people who…

We moved July 3rd … today is August 16th and I still feel like we’re living in a really nice AirBnb. I usually find the silverware drawer on the second try now, but I still haven’t found the pot…

We moved July 3rd �…

We moved July 3rd … today is August 16th and I still feel like we’re living in a really nice AirBnb. I usually find the silverware drawer on the second try now, but I still haven’t found the potato masher or the duster. I really need to rearrange some stuff in my kitchen. My office closet is still a disaster. And I really miss my hot water dispenser, of all things! Thankfully our pup has adjusted extremely well – I was a bit concerned. Lincoln has been over to spend the night several times, and he’s claimed ownership of a corner of my office closet. Also this: I think he�…

July 29, 2025 Here I sit, surrounded with familiar things in this unfamiliar space thinking about how I desperately need to do a post. First, because it is desperately overdue! And second, because …

July 29, 2025 Her…

July 29, 2025 Here I sit, surrounded with familiar things in this unfamiliar space thinking about how I desperately need to do a post. First, because it is desperately overdue! And second, because I really want to tell you about all things moving. I keep thinking I’ll pick up my pen again, just as soon as I [do this one thing….] The problem is that as soon as that one thing resolves the next one pops up! So I decided to sit down amidst this chaos that is my new office, turn on the computer and just see what happens. As you’ve guessed, we’ve moved since my last post! It was rou…

This is a repost from 2015 – what was true then is true now. As we prepare to move, our next “season” is unfolding before us … and nothing fits the same anymore! ————- I have thi…

This is a repost fro…

This is a repost from 2015 – what was true then is true now. As we prepare to move, our next “season” is unfolding before us … and nothing fits the same anymore! ————- I have this pair of fuzzy pants. They’re my favorite. My go-to, first thing I put on when the laundry’s done, favorite! Cute, huh? Colorful, a little loud, maybe, quite noticeable. There’s just one problem. They don’t fit anymore. My weight has changed, and these much-loved pants aren’t comfortable now. So what’s a girl to do? I mean, am I the only one who loves their favorite co…

Change. I’ve had a lot of it in this life, and I’ve gotten pretty used to it.* For a bunch of good reasons, we’re going to be moving. When? Not sure. Where? Nope, don’t know yet. All of wh…

Change. I’ve had a…

Change. I’ve had a lot of it in this life, and I’ve gotten pretty used to it.* For a bunch of good reasons, we’re going to be moving. When? Not sure. Where? Nope, don’t know yet. All of which is ok, because God. However, I seem to be getting sentimental and I don’t much care for it. I’m not attached to these “things” I’m sifting through, at all – except for a very few of them, giving and tossing aren’t hard for me.  Since I know this about myself, I was caught off guard last night by a tsunami of big, brimming Emotions. Blindsided with feelings of loss and miss…

Last Monday, April 21st, I turned 61. There, that’s out of the way! Our birthdays do matter, however they may feel, and some just feel weird. Like when my daughter turned 40 – NO you may not be 4…

Last Monday, April 2…

Last Monday, April 21st, I turned 61. There, that’s out of the way! Our birthdays do matter, however they may feel, and some just feel weird. Like when my daughter turned 40 – NO you may not be 40 because I’M 40. Confused about that cake? No, it’s not just wishful thinking. I’ve shared my birth story and my adoption story previously, but I’m here today to fill in what is an incomplete picture. I was raised in church, but I didn’t pay much attention and mostly I just memorized stuff. I’d always believed He was real, but He seemed distant and unconcerned about me. If h…

The other day I asked my favorite 10-year-old (aka my grandson Lincoln) to give me a topic for an article this week. Linc: Uh, I don’t know. Me: C’mon man I need help! Linc [makes grindin…

The other day I aske…

The other day I asked my favorite 10-year-old (aka my grandson Lincoln) to give me a topic for an article this week. Linc: Uh, I don’t know. Me: C’mon man I need help! Linc [makes grinding noise]: OK let me just boot up my brain … Me: [waiting …] Linc: I KNOW – write about my chickens! Oh snap. Now I gotta write about his chickens, don’t I! So here goes. A few months ago, Lincoln’s mama decided to become a chicken farmer, right in the middle of Suburbia, USA. She would have to verify, but I’m pretty sure he was the only one in the household who was inte…

What do you worry about? What makes your stomach hurt and your heart pound? Here’s a few things that I must claim: Health Finances Future My kids and grandkids How I spend my time …

What do you worry ab…

What do you worry about? What makes your stomach hurt and your heart pound? Here’s a few things that I must claim: Health Finances Future My kids and grandkids How I spend my time This crazy world Trust me, I could go on. But I think maybe these things are fairly universal? My health is rotten, there’s a good reason to feel anxious. Our finances, along with Retirement plans, are a bit messier than expected. My kids and grandkids are all fine, don’t worry (ha) – but I’m starting to realize that we will forever worry a bit about our kids. My time? I waste a lot o…

This spoon is an intruder. I have no idea where it came from – an old set of silverware? Someone else’s house? Who knows. What I do know is that it does not match our current silverware set, at al…

This spoon is an int…

This spoon is an intruder. I have no idea where it came from – an old set of silverware? Someone else’s house? Who knows. What I do know is that it does not match our current silverware set, at all. Which we’ve had for … maybe 15 years? And this one weirdly wrong spoon has recycled itself into the drawer over and over ever since. Yesterday when I pulled it out of the dishwasher, I started to put it away as usual. But I stopped dead in my tracks as the thought came to me: WHY ARE YOU SAVING THAT? Now I could say I’m saving it because it is unique, different from all the other…