The Day After Christmas

n

When I was growing up in 1950s New England, the day after Christmas was a recovery day. Kids played with toys that werenu2019t broken yet. If there was snow, boys went outside for sledding, and snowfort snowball fights. If it was cold and not much recent snow we went to the swamp or the Rez for pick-up hockey. Girls went to the Rez to try out pirouettes on those white figure skates with the pom-pom laces.

n

Parents cleaned up any trash left from the chaos of the day before, ate leftovers, and generally walked around shaking their heads and staring blankly, while muttering, u201cnext year. . . u201c

n

When I moved to London, I heard the day called u201cBoxing Day.u201d When I inquired, I was told, u201cWell not so much anymore, but in days past, it was the servantsu2019 Christmas. You see they had to work on the holiday itself, so on Boxing Day, they had the day off. The household delivered a box with presents to the servantsu2019 houses and they had Christmas.u201d

n

Some said, u201dIt was the day you boxed up those clothes and other things that had been replaced by this yearu2019s presents and took them to the church for the poor,u201d (sort of like u201cGiving Tuesdayu201d).

n

Others of my 1979 London Business School classmates described it, as the day u201cwhen one used to take presents to tradespeople and shopkeepers.u201d Theu00a0 implication from all these descriptions was it was a traditional day of giving to others less fortunate, but u201cless practiced now than it used to be.u201d

n

St. Stephenu2019s Day

n

Helen Ou2019Sullivan, who lived in the Council flats behind us up near Gladstone Park, told us, u201cWell, I donu2019t know nothinu2019 about that Boxinu2019 Day stuff. Itu2019s St. Stephenu2019s Day, doncha know?u2019

n

She went on to tell us that St. Stephen was the u201cvery first Christian martyr. It was soon after Jesus died and Stephen was a deacon assigned to hand out food to the widows. Well some didnu2019t like who was gettinu2019 what food, and the like, and Stephen, he jest give u2018em what for. Thereu2019s a whole speech in the book of Acts in the Bible that the nuns made us memorize when we was kids u2013 u2018Tu2019was a LONG speech u2013 u2018bout how people didnu2019t treat their prophets right including Jesus who was now dead on the cross. Well – those folks didnu2019t much like his mouth so they took him out and stoned him tu2019death. u00a0And thatu2019s how he become the first Christian martyr. The nuns said it was a lesson about speakinu2019 up and speakinu2019 the truth, but honestly us kids thought u00a0– that didnu2019t work out too well for Stephen.u201d

n

This was the first I heard about St. Stephenu2019s Day, which is a big holiday in Ireland and Wales and a lot of other countries. Advent, the time before Christmas (December 3rd -24th) is said to bring u201cGod to Man.u201d The Twelve days of Christmas, of which The Feast of St. Stephen, is the first day, u201cbrings Man to God.u201d

n

I only know this stuff through Google searches today; I wasnu2019t raised with it, but the Twelve Days go all the way to January 6^th, Epiphany, the day Casper (Gaspar) Balthazar, and Melchior, arrived to worship Jesus in the manger of his birth. The Magi, these three kings or wisemen, brought gifts (gold, frankincense, and myrrh), and I know there is a whole symbolism about each of the gifts and the kings, but itu2019s tough to get into someone elseu2019s mythology. The only thing the u201cGift of the Magiu201d brings up for me is the wonderful Guy De Maupassant short story about the poor husband who sells his watch to buy beautiful combs for his wifeu2019s lovely hair. Spoiler alert: She cuts and sells her hair to buy him a watch chain. Pure love.

n

The Divorced Fatheru2019s Christmas

n

I separated from my first wife when my kids were little. I moved a block away in the same neighborhood so on Christmas Kirsten and I subjected our children to Christmas morning at her house, Christmas afternoon at mine, and then back to her house for Christmas dinner. In retrospect this made Christmas day fraught with an unnecessary u201churry upu201d schedule for the kids and not insignificant parental conflict.

n

Most of my divorced male friend celebrate with their kids on December 26^th. There is still the kid-indulgence-impact of two Christmases, and the parental conflict about pick up and drop off times, but at least the schedule is less compressed. Perhaps because of that grandparents can participate in one of the two Christmas extravaganzas.

n

My wife Billie went through this with her children too, with similar angst. All our kids are grown, and have children of their own now. They seem reasonably well-adjusted, despite what was done to them over the holidays. Of course, we donu2019t sit in their therapistsu2019 chairs and our children were raised to be polite, so what do we know?

n

Another Day Forward

n

As regular readers of this blog will know, I have reached the age where I have accepted my mistakes, and try to look forward even when I ruminate on the past. I am grateful for the Christmas gathering of family and friends and am looking forward to the New Year.

n

I wish for all my readers this same attitude, which, if I am really honest I donu2019t maintain every day, despite good intentions. The day after Christmas is another day – not just another day, but a blessing.

n

Perhaps we can carry forward some of the Joy and Peace spirit into the New Year, listen a little more, judge a little less, donate some clothes or foods, or Money to those less fortunate than ourselves u00a0– in the Boxing Day Spirit?

n

n

Happy New Year!

“,”tablet”:”

The Day After Christmas

n

When I was growing up in 1950s New England, the day after Christmas was a recovery day. Kids played with toys that werenu2019t broken yet. If there was snow, boys went outside for sledding, and snowfort snowball fights. If it was cold and not much recent snow we went to the swamp or the Rez for pick-up hockey. Girls went to the Rez to try out pirouettes on those white figure skates with the pom-pom laces.

n

Parents cleaned up any trash left from the chaos of the day before, ate leftovers, and generally walked around shaking their heads and staring blankly, while muttering, u201cnext year. . . u201c

n

When I moved to London, I heard the day called u201cBoxing Day.u201d When I inquired, I was told, u201cWell not so much anymore, but in days past, it was the servantsu2019 Christmas. You see they had to work on the holiday itself, so on Boxing Day, they had the day off. The household delivered a box with presents to the servantsu2019 houses and they had Christmas.u201d

n

Some said, u201dIt was the day you boxed up those clothes and other things that had been replaced by this yearu2019s presents and took them to the church for the poor,u201d (sort of like u201cGiving Tuesdayu201d).

n

Others of my 1979 London Business School classmates described it, as the day u201cwhen one used to take presents to tradespeople and shopkeepers.u201d The implication from all these descriptions was it was a traditional day of giving to others less fortunate, but u201cless practiced now than it used to be.u201d

n

St. Stephenu2019s Day

n

Helen Ou2019Sullivan, who lived in the Council flats behind us up near Gladstone Park, told us, u201cWell, I donu2019t know nothinu2019 about that Boxinu2019 Day stuff. Itu2019s St. Stephenu2019s Day, doncha know?u2019

n

She went on to tell us that St. Stephen was the u201cvery first Christian martyr. It was soon after Jesus died and Stephen was a deacon assigned to hand out food to the widows. Well some didnu2019t like who was gettinu2019 what food, and the like, and Stephen, he jest give u2018em what for. Thereu2019s a whole speech in the book of Acts in the Bible that the nuns made us memorize when we was kids u2013 u2018Tu2019was a LONG speech u2013 u2018bout how people didnu2019t treat their prophets right including Jesus who was now dead on the cross. Well – those folks didnu2019t much like his mouth so they took him out and stoned him tu2019death. And thatu2019s how he become the first Christian martyr. The nuns said it was a lesson about speakinu2019 up and speakinu2019 the truth, but honestly us kids thought – that didnu2019t work out too well for Stephen.u201d

n

This was the first I heard about St. Stephenu2019s Day, which is a big holiday in Ireland and Wales and a lot of other countries. Advent, the time before Christmas (December 3rd -24th) is said to bring u201cGod to Man.u201d The Twelve days of Christmas, of which The Feast of St. Stephen, is the first day, u201cbrings Man to God.u201d

n

I only know this stuff through Google searches today; I wasnu2019t raised with it, but the Twelve Days go all the way to January 6^th, Epiphany, the day Casper (Gaspar) Balthazar, and Melchior, arrived to worship Jesus in the manger of his birth. The Magi, these three kings or wisemen, brought gifts (gold, frankincense, and myrrh) and I know there is a whole symbolism about each of the gifts and the kings, but itu2019s tough to get into someone elseu2019s mythology. The only thing the u201cGift of the Magiu201d brings up for me is the wonderful Guy De Maupassant short story about the poor husband who sells his watch to buy beautiful combs for his wifeu2019s lovely hair. Spoiler alert: She cuts and sells her hair to buy him a watch chain. Pure love.

n

The Divorced Fatheru2019s Christmas

n

I separated from my first wife when my kids were little. I moved a block away in the same neighborhood so on Christmas Kirsten and I subjected our children to Christmas morning at her house, Christmas afternoon at mine, and then back to her house for Christmas dinner. In retrospect this made Christmas day fraught with an unnecessary u201churry upu201d schedule for the kids and not insignificant parental conflict.

n

Most of my divorced male friend celebrate with their kids on December 26^th. There is still the kid-indulgence-impact of two Christmases, and the parental conflict about pick up and drop off times, but at least the schedule is less compressed. Perhaps because of that grandparents can participate in one of the two Christmas extravaganzas.

n

My wife Billie went through this with her children too, with similar angst. All our kids are grown, and have children of their own now. They seem reasonably well-adjusted, despite what was done to them over the holidays. Of course, we donu2019t sit in their therapistsu2019 chairs and our children were raised to be polite, so what do we know?

n

Another Day Forward

n

As regular readers of this blog will know, I have reached the age where I have accepted my mistakes, and try to look forward even when I ruminate on the past. I am grateful for the Christmas gathering of family and friends and am looking forward to the New Year.

n

I wish for all my readers this same attitude, which, if I am really honest I donu2019t maintain every day, despite good intentions. The day after Christmas is another day – not just another day, but a blessing.

n

Perhaps we can carry forward some of the Joy and Peace spirit into the New Year, listen a little more, judge a little less, donate some clothes or foods, or money to those less fortunate than ourselves – in the Boxing Day Spirit?

n

n

Happy New Year!

“,”phone”:”

n

The Day After Christmas

n

When I was growing up in 1950s New England, the day after Christmas was a recovery day. Kids played with toys that werenu2019t broken yet. If there was snow, boys went outside for sledding, and snowfort snowball fights. If it was cold and not much recent snow we went to the swamp or the Rez for pick-up hockey. Girls went to the Rez to try out pirouettes on those white figure skates with the pom-pom laces.

n

Parents cleaned up any trash left from the chaos of the day before, ate leftovers, and generally walked around shaking their heads and staring blankly, while muttering, u201cnext year. . . u201c

n

When I moved to London, I heard the day called u201cBoxing Day.u201d When I inquired, I was told, u201cWell not so much anymore, but in days past, it was the servantsu2019 Christmas. You see they had to work on the holiday itself, so on Boxing Day, they had the day off. The household delivered a box with presents to the servantsu2019 houses and they had Christmas.u201d

n

Some said, u201dIt was the day you boxed up those clothes and other things that had been replaced by this yearu2019s presents and took them to the church for the poor,u201d (sort of like u201cGiving Tuesdayu201d).

n

Others of my 1979 London Business School classmates described it, as the day u201cwhen one used to take presents to tradespeople and shopkeepers.u201d The implication from all these descriptions was it was a traditional day of giving to others less fortunate, but u201cless practiced now than it used to be.u201d

n

St. Stephenu2019s Day

n

Helen Ou2019Sullivan, who lived in the Council flats behind us up near Gladstone Park, told us, u201cWell, I donu2019t know nothinu2019 about that Boxinu2019 Day stuff. Itu2019s St. Stephenu2019s Day, doncha know?u2019

n

She went on to tell us that St. Stephen was the u201cvery first Christian martyr. It was soon after Jesus died and Stephen was a deacon assigned to hand out food to the widows. Well some didnu2019t like who was gettinu2019 what food, and the like, and Stephen, he jest give u2018em what for. Thereu2019s a whole speech in the book of Acts in the Bible that the nuns made us memorize when we was kids u2013 u2018Tu2019was a LONG speech u2013 u2018bout how people didnu2019t treat their prophets right including Jesus who was now dead on the cross. Well – those folks didnu2019t much like his mouth so they took him out and stoned him tu2019death. And thatu2019s how he become the first Christian martyr. The nuns said it was a lesson about speakinu2019 up and speakinu2019 the truth, but honestly us kids thought – that didnu2019t work out too well for Stephen.u201d

n

This was the first I heard about St. Stephenu2019s Day, which is a big holiday in Ireland and Wales and a lot of other countries. Advent, the time before Christmas (December 3rd -24th) is said to bring u201cGod to Man.u201d The Twelve days of Christmas, of which The Feast of St. Stephen, is the first day, u201cbrings Man to God.u201d

n

I only know this stuff through Google searches today; I wasnu2019t raised with it, but the Twelve Days go all the way to January 6^th, Epiphany, the day Casper (Gaspar) Balthazar, and Melchior, arrived to worship Jesus in the manger of his birth. The Magi, these three kings or wisemen, brought gifts (gold, frankincense, and myrrh) and I know there is a whole symbolism about each of the gifts and the kings, but itu2019s tough to get into someone elseu2019s mythology. The only thing the u201cGift of the Magiu201d brings up for me is the wonderful Guy De Maupassant short story about the poor husband who sells his watch to buy beautiful combs for his wifeu2019s lovely hair. Spoiler alert: She cuts and sells her hair to buy him a watch chain. Pure love.

n

The Divorced Fatheru2019s Christmas

n

I separated from my first wife when my kids were little. I moved a block away in the same neighborhood so on Christmas Kirsten and I subjected our children to Christmas morning at her house, Christmas afternoon at mine, and then back to her house for Christmas dinner. In retrospect this made Christmas day fraught with an unnecessary u201churry upu201d schedule for the kids and not insignificant parental conflict.

n

Most of my divorced male friend celebrate with their kids on December 26^th. There is still the kid-indulgence-impact of two Christmases, and the parental conflict about pick up and drop off times, but at least the schedule is less compressed. Perhaps because of that grandparents can participate in one of the two Christmas extravaganzas.

n

My wife Billie went through this with her children too, with similar angst. All our kids are grown, and have children of their own now. They seem reasonably well-adjusted, despite what was done to them over the holidays. Of course, we donu2019t sit in their therapistsu2019 chairs and our children were raised to be polite, so what do we know?

n

Another Day Forward

n

As regular readers of this blog will know, I have reached the age where I have accepted my mistakes, and try to look forward even when I ruminate on the past. I am grateful for the Christmas gathering of family and friends and am looking forward to the New Year.

n

I wish for all my readers this same attitude, which, if I am really honest I donu2019t maintain every day, despite good intentions. The day after Christmas is another day – not just another day, but a blessing.

n

Perhaps we can carry forward some of the Joy and Peace spirit into the New Year, listen a little more, judge a little less, donate some clothes or foods, or money to those less fortunate than ourselves – in the Boxing Day Spirit?

n

n

Happy New Year!

“}},”slug”:”et_pb_text”}” data-et-multi-view-load-tablet-hidden=”true” data-et-multi-view-load-phone-hidden=”true”>

The Day After Christmas

When I was growing up in 1950s New England, the day after Christmas was a recovery day. Kids played with toys that weren’t broken yet. If there was snow, boys went outside for sledding, and snowfort snowball fights. If it was cold and not much recent snow we went to the swamp or the Rez for pick-up hockey. Girls went to the Rez to try out pirouettes on those white figure skates with the pom-pom laces.

Parents cleaned up any trash left from the chaos of the day before, ate leftovers, and generally walked around shaking their heads and staring blankly, while muttering, “next year. . . “

When I moved to London, I heard the day called “Boxing Day.” When I inquired, I was told, “Well not so much anymore, but in days past, it was the servants’ Christmas. You see they had to work on the holiday itself, so on Boxing Day, they had the day off. The household delivered a box with presents to the servants’ houses and they had Christmas.”

Some said, ”It was the day you boxed up those clothes and other things that had been replaced by this year’s presents and took them to the church for the poor,” (sort of like “Giving Tuesday”).

Others of my 1979 London Business School classmates described it, as the day “when one used to take presents to tradespeople and shopkeepers.” The  implication from all these descriptions was it was a traditional day of giving to others less fortunate, but “less practiced now than it used to be.”

St. Stephen’s Day

Helen O’Sullivan, who lived in the Council flats behind us up near Gladstone Park, told us, “Well, I don’t know nothin’ about that Boxin’ Day stuff. It’s St. Stephen’s Day, doncha know?’

She went on to tell us that St. Stephen was the “very first Christian martyr. It was soon after Jesus died and Stephen was a deacon assigned to hand out food to the widows. Well some didn’t like who was gettin’ what food, and the like, and Stephen, he jest give ‘em what for. There’s a whole speech in the book of Acts in the Bible that the nuns made us memorize when we was kids – ‘T’was a LONG speech – ‘bout how people didn’t treat their prophets right including Jesus who was now dead on the cross. Well – those folks didn’t much like his mouth so they took him out and stoned him t’death.  And that’s how he become the first Christian martyr. The nuns said it was a lesson about speakin’ up and speakin’ the truth, but honestly us kids thought  – that didn’t work out too well for Stephen.”

This was the first I heard about St. Stephen’s Day, which is a big holiday in Ireland and Wales and a lot of other countries. Advent, the time before Christmas (December 3rd -24th) is said to bring “God to Man.” The Twelve days of Christmas, of which The Feast of St. Stephen, is the first day, “brings Man to God.”

I only know this stuff through Google searches today; I wasn’t raised with it, but the Twelve Days go all the way to January 6^th, Epiphany, the day Casper (Gaspar) Balthazar, and Melchior, arrived to worship Jesus in the manger of his birth. The Magi, these three kings or wisemen, brought gifts (gold, frankincense, and myrrh), and I know there is a whole symbolism about each of the gifts and the kings, but it’s tough to get into someone else’s mythology. The only thing the “Gift of the Magi” brings up for me is the wonderful Guy De Maupassant short story about the poor husband who sells his watch to buy beautiful combs for his wife’s lovely hair. Spoiler alert: She cuts and sells her hair to buy him a watch chain. Pure love.

The Divorced Father’s Christmas

I separated from my first wife when my kids were little. I moved a block away in the same neighborhood so on Christmas Kirsten and I subjected our children to Christmas morning at her house, Christmas afternoon at mine, and then back to her house for Christmas dinner. In retrospect this made Christmas day fraught with an unnecessary “hurry up” schedule for the kids and not insignificant parental conflict.

Most of my divorced male friend celebrate with their kids on December 26^th. There is still the kid-indulgence-impact of two Christmases, and the parental conflict about pick up and drop off times, but at least the schedule is less compressed. Perhaps because of that grandparents can participate in one of the two Christmas extravaganzas.

My wife Billie went through this with her children too, with similar angst. All our kids are grown, and have children of their own now. They seem reasonably well-adjusted, despite what was done to them over the holidays. Of course, we don’t sit in their therapists’ chairs and our children were raised to be polite, so what do we know?

Another Day Forward

As regular readers of this blog will know, I have reached the age where I have accepted my mistakes, and try to look forward even when I ruminate on the past. I am grateful for the Christmas gathering of family and friends and am looking forward to the New Year.

I wish for all my readers this same attitude, which, if I am really honest I don’t maintain every day, despite good intentions. The day after Christmas is another day – not just another day, but a blessing.

Perhaps we can carry forward some of the Joy and Peace spirit into the New Year, listen a little more, judge a little less, donate some clothes or foods, or money to those less fortunate than ourselves  – in the Boxing Day Spirit?

Happy New Year!