You’re not failing because of lack of skill or effort. You’re failing because of patterns you picked up before you were old enough to choose them. Dr. Kevin Mays, leadership coach and author of Lead Yourself First, built a career helping executives see that the behaviors driving their success are often the exact same ones quietly sabotaging what they’re trying to build.
What You’ll Learn
About the Guest:
Dr. Kevin Mays is a leadership coach, speaker, and author based in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Through his company, Upgrade Your Leadership, he works with executives and founders to uncover the unconscious patterns holding them back and develop the self-awareness needed to lead at a higher level. His book, Lead Yourself First, recently made the Amazon best-seller list.
TIMESTAMPS:
00:00 — Cold open and show introduction
01:25 — Welcome and breathing Exercise before the call
03:36 — Kevin’s upbringing in Michigan: the car company culture and what it programmed
05:22 — Birth order, Family patterns, and the youngest child’s drive for attention
08:11 — How Kevin began studying self-awareness and what opened that door
09:12 — The motorcycle trip: riding to the Pacific Coast until the bike broke down
12:50 — Aeronautical engineering, near-miss in the airplane, and choosing a different road
15:48 — Identity falling away piece by piece and the moment of real surrender
19:22 — How to strip away constraint without hitting bottom first
22:48 — Quitting his job, moving to Michigan, and committing with no plan B
27:06 — Overcoming early programming: affirmations, rewiring neural pathways, and the piano analogy
31:48 — Releasing constraint vs. replacing it: Kevin pushes back on ‘brainwashing’
34:37 — Music, Rumi, and how Kevin finds presence and energy
35:18 — Lori’s five key takeaways from the conversation
38:12 — Closing
Connect with Dr. Kevin Mays:
About the Show:
Fine Is a 4-Letter Word is the show for leaders who are tired of pretending everything is okay. Host Lori Saitz brings on guests who get honest about what it really takes to lead with empathy, vulnerability, gratitude, and courage. New episodes every week.
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