It’s the Giving Season! Did you know the saying “Tis better to give than to receive” is actually true? We are built to have the desire to give back without expecting anything in return by the time we hit midlife. This is called generativity, a term coined by developmental psychologist Erik Erikson.
Many midlifers believe they need to be ‘at the top of their game’ to give back through Philanthropy, mentorship, or Volunteering, so they delay taking generative action because they don’t know where to start. This is compounded by the lack of clear guidance on how and where to contribute in meaningful ways during midlife. Sure, there is philanthropy, which is more than obvious between Thanksgiving and Christmas, with pleas for charitable donations from just about everyone. However, this isn’t the sort of generativity most midlifers are looking for. Most are looking for personal meaning that goes beyond a check. But don’t worry, there are several ways to give during the giving season that have meaning and can fulfill the generativity itch.
First, acknowledge that in midlife your experience is valuable. No matter what area, you have years of experience that count for a lot more than most midlifers give themselves credit for. You don’t need to wait any longer.
Second, you don’t have to look far to give back. You can mentor someone at work who is in another department, junior to your rank, or someone who is thinking of changing careers and is looking for advice to get into your field. You can also mentor someone in your field of interest, but for an outside organization. Plenty of nonprofits look for volunteers and mentors to help.
Third, find out what is meaningful to you. What impact do you want to make? Do you want to pass on your values? This can be done through your house of worship or community centers. Do you want to impart your skills or knowledge to someone? This can be done informally or formally at work, in nonprofits, and with people you already know (Family, friends).
We all have special skills and talents. And, it is never too early to start giving.
I’ll be unpacking this more during Office Hours for paid subscribers.
You can find more about this and other midlife topics in The Right Side of 40 on Psychology Today.
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Originally Published on https://deborahheiserphd.substack.com/
