“What are you hoping for in 2024?”  Is it better health, more wealth, more opportunities, more fulfilling relationships?

I revisited a blog I wrote this time last year entitled: Who do you want to be in 2023?

That blog came to me after a conversation with a business acquaintance who was going through a serious health crisis. I called him Ben. His attitude was so unbelievably positive, his energy upbeat, his voice strong, his fortitude and determination palpable; I could almost feel it through the telephone. It wasn’t false positivity; it was heartfelt and genuine. I could sense it came from the very fabric of his being.

Ben described himself as having an unbelievably high pain tolerance. He recounted the situations when the pain was so intense, so excruciating, accompanied by vertigo, nausea and banging in his inner ear, that it made him feel like he was breaking in two. He gave himself permission to surrender to it for a few days but then picked himself back up and forged ahead.

I felt that I learned much from that conversation. But, in rereading it, I realized I still have a way to go. How difficult it is to achieve it is not a reason for me to surrender.  There is a clear path to travel on that road.

In all honesty, I’ve had my moments when feeling completely discouraged and disheartened. At those times, I’ve been fortunate enough to have friends who have helped me look at what’s happening through a different lens.

Not everyone is as fortunate to have people in their lives who have a different perspective and can offer a different viewpoint. It seems wherever they turn they are surrounded by negativity: in relationships and situations. I’ve recently met someone who described just that.

The saying like attracts like may apply here. It begins from within, and it begins from the desire to make the change. It may even mean extricating oneself from negative relationships or discarding those relationships that no longer serve you well. Simple, yes. Easy to do, no. Sometimes, those relationships are those that are closest to us and are as comfortable as an old shoe. It becomes a familiar dance. Each party knows the steps.

Though we may all feel that way from time to time, Ben told me he didn’t have any time or energy for those feelings. He said those feelings wouldn’t get him anywhere.

I woke up today thinking about that conversation, realizing that there was no time for anything less than the fortitude and Resilience I heard in Ben’s voice just about one year ago.

Throughout the day I’ve been thinking about mindset. Reframing our thinking when we find ourselves in a negative response pattern isn’t easy. It’s almost as if, as Cher says in the scene when she slaps Nicholas Cage in the face in the film Moonstruck, “snap out of it.”.

How can we “snap out of it” to change direction, change our attitude, change our mindset? Metaphorically speaking, it’s almost like splashing cold water on your face.

It’s akin to rewiring our brain.

I’ve termed it, “positivity on demand” not to be confused with being a Pollyanna. But how do you get there? It requires a mindset shift, which can only happen when you’re fully present in the moment but also resolute in changing your perspective.

When hearing the words gratitude, wealth, abundance and prosperity, it’s not unusual to think primarily of financial wealth, financial abundance of financial prosperity. However, that would be limited thinking.

We can be wealthy, abundant and prosperous in our relationships, our attitudes, our health and wellbeing, our lifestyle, and the opportunities and people that come our way, both personal and professional.

What a successful life It would be if we could truly value it in that way. The acronym SWAP came into my mind. Success – Wealth – Abundance – Prosperity. Can I keep that mindset?

Gray clouds hung over the morning sky…it appeared it was going to be a gloomy day. A short time later I ran into a gal who complained of the dreariness, misty air, and cloudy skies.

I looked up but believed I could see a brightness beyond the clouds…like the sun was looming, waiting in the distance for its turn to once-again shine brightly. I remarked that it helped us that much more to appreciate the sunshine and warmth of the previous day.

In a previous time, I might have agreed with her. We likely would have continued to talk about the gloomy day, the possibility of rain, and the dreariness that can affect a person’s entire attitude.

But, in that moment, I realized I did a kind of mental SWAP, exchanging one attitude for another. If you want to feel better, you have to think better, and see things better.

Admittedly, this isn’t easy because how we think is also a habit… a habit, based on the fact that 90% of our thoughts are negative and we have between 60-80,000 thoughts running through our minds each day.

So how can you “snap out of it” without Cher’s proverbial slap in the face?

Try this:

S. Snap your fingers.

W. Wait a moment to note what’s happening.

A. Analyze and be Aware of your response

P. Plan to move forward with Positivity

We can choose who we want to be. We’re still at the dawn of the new year, a new year giving us new opportunities.

So, what are you hoping for in 2024?

Will you be the person who values Success as Wealth, Abundance and Prosperity in the richness of your thoughts, attitudes, connections, relationships and opportunities and who can turn the tide of negativity and reframe it into a more positive mindset and attitude? This will play an important role in your overall wellness and healthful longevity. After all, we all attract what’s in our minds and in our hearts.

To receive The SeniorScape® to your inbox, learn more about mindfulness, strategies to shift your mindset as part of your overall wellness or longevity action plan email: Phyllis@phyllisaymanassociates.com or book a time on my calendar for a free 20 minute consultation: https://calendly.com/phyllis-31/laying-the-groundwork-2

Originally Published on https://www.phyllisaymanassociates.com/

Phyllis Ayman Ambassador for Conscious Aging Life Management and #1 WSJ and USA Today Best Selling Author, Podcaster

Phyllis Ayman is the Ambassador for Conscious Aging Life Management, and founder of Mindful Longevity Solutions. She coaches individuals to develop their Personalized Longevity or Wellness Care Plans so they can live as healthfully, happily ,and fulfilled as they possibly can. As an aging life careplanning coach and mediator, she guides families to make decisions and mediate challenging conversations around aging care issues. She conceived and owns the trademark IMpathy®, essentially the inner game of empathy, which the hallmark of her proprietary programs.

Ayman is a #1 WSJ and USA Today Best Selling author, featured speaker, panel moderator, trainer, advocate gerontological speech/language pathologist and dementia care specialist. She spent over 40,000 hours working with thousands of individuals and families in long term care. Her writings have been featured in Next Avenue, McKnight’s Long Term Care News and McKnight’s Senior Living, and the National Council of Certified Dementia Practitioner Newsletters.