Happy Fourth of July and 250 years 

Our best stories are hiding in plain sight and when we share them we experience ourselves in a new way.

Our country exists because hundreds of years ago Native Americans  demonstrated Humanity. When ships full of oddly dressed, and very melanin- free white folks staggered across the  beach, their arrival was witnessed by Native Americans knew that “these people are not going to survive if we don’t help”

So our Indigenous people did a courageous thing – They helped strangers and demonstrated the Original American Value – Sharing and Community — they shared their food, knowledge and their land. They took a chance that these actions would be enough and they could co-exist with these odd people.

We are also here because many people who came before us were resilient – not by choice but by necessity. Tethered and chained. Conscripted .Working the fields,  railways and mines – Nameless and the unseen “those they don’t matter but we need them people”  who have served as human fuel for our American vision and projects. They did and continue to do the work that we need but do not want to do.

What if we used this 4th to remember that our stories started somewhere else- that our way back when relatives were considered problems – They were  too poor, too many, too needy, and a troublesome risk.

What if we stopped to consider that many of the stories we inherited in our families were born in anger,  ignorance and the fear that there will not be enough to share and we will lose what we have. It’s better to push others away. It’s safer. 

When I was growing up in Queens nearly everyone on that street came from another country. They had saved and struggled to buy a house and obtain their piece of the American Dream. 

When I was in middle school  an African American Family moved into the Brown house on the corner.  I remember hearing a few of the neighbors expressing worry that bad things would start to happen and that their houses would become worthless. I heard one of them ask “how did we let this happen and what can we do about this?” I was shocked because the person who asked this was always kind to me and now she seemed so different. Fortunately no one did something stupid and that house stayed tidy and well and the owners were nice people who I greeted on my way to the bus stop.  

A year later a Filipino family moved in. They were short like me and spoke English in a singsongy way and always smiled when I passed.But I don’t remember them socializing with the other neighbors.

When they were here a year  they invited our entire block to their home for a house blessing and party.  It was such a great idea. The women on our block wouldn’t have to cook that night and none of them were going to stay home and miss out on an opportunity practise their collective noisiness and check out  the inside of this house.Yes – Food and curiosity are the best ice breakers when you find that you are “the other”.  When we arrived in a group where we were warmly greeted and saw that an abundant array of traditional foods had been prepared.. The owners had made a lot of noodles and spring rolls so I was very happy.  

The following summer we received another house blessing invitation –  and I remember my mother saying “they ‘re going to bless the house again? They did. This time we came in separate clusters. We brought more cake and I ate more noodles. I was very happy. 

That family continued to invite everyone every year, embedding a Love of Filipino food in my heart and a life lesson about sharing gratitude and food. 

So I want to wish everyone a Happy 4th  – Keep connecting with others. Listen and learn about the stories that are hiding in plain sight. 

And take a minute to share an experience you had that changed “those people” into a neighbor and friend. 

I learned it in Queens. Go here to hear the audio clip and learn more about my book

https://www.facebook.com/learneditinqueenscommunicationplaybook

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Julienne Ryan Humorist, Speaker, Trainer, Facilitator, Coach

Julienne B. Ryan began her professional career at age five when she did TV commercials and learned important things like “the teamsters always eat first,” her social security number and how to endorse checks for bank deposit.

Ryan studied psychology in college because she wanted to understand humans. She conducted her “field work” in a variety of roles, hearing the phrases “merger synergies, reorganizations, downsizing and rightsizing for change” more times than she cares to mention.

Later she enrolled in an Ivy League graduate school where she paid oodles of money to validate her prior on-the-job learning experiences. However, she did learn to name drop up-to-date theories and trendy psychologists with alarming ease.

Ryan evolved into working in “Talent Management,” a fancy way of saying “try to find people and keep them moderately happy.” With inadequate budgets and staff allocations, she had to find creative ways to encourage her staff to work effectively. These ranged from begging and borrowing resources, improvising childcare, telling stories and even giving snacks as rewards. She tried to convince herself that working a bazillion hours and “multi-tasking” equaled achievement.

Her work took place in cubicles, conference rooms or, with luck, in offices with a door. Occasionally she would make the time to emerge from her allotted real estate to really talk to people. Ryan learned something transformative in the process:

Yes, she was effective. But not because she used fancy theories – or gave great snacks. Ryan’s success, her staff believed, was a result of her uncanny knack for weaving storytelling with humor to motivate and encourage them. Crucially, they encouraged Ryan to de-emphasize “that normal HR stuff” and focus on bringing her unique storytelling skills to a broader stage.

Thanks to them, Ryan continues to collect, connect and tell stories in her work helping people find their “true selves in the world of work.

She is the author of the humorous, all true "The Learned It In Queens Communications Playbook - Winning Against Distraction!".that now includes a workbook and is available at booksellers across the globe..

She is a guest contributor to The Procurement Foundry, LifeBlood, and the global storytelling community.

Certifications include
Accumatch (BI) Behavior Intelligence
Narativ Applied Storytelling Methodologies
Collective Brains – Mentorship Methodologies