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May 26th, 2026

The Grief Book That Refuses to Be Sad: Why One Author Chose Awareness Over Happiness

  1. The Grief Book That Refuses to Be Sad: Why One Author Chose Awareness Over Happiness Emily Thiroux Threatt 39:03

If you’ve ever wondered how grief can become a gateway to self-discovery, Episode 432 of the Grief and Happiness podcast is for you. Author Lori Carlson-Hijuelos shares the story behind A Writing Marriage — a memoir woven together with the final unfinished manuscript of her late husband, Pulitzer Prize-winning novelist Oscar Hijuelos. Through writing inside a cathedral, Lori finds not happiness in her grief, but something quieter and more powerful: awareness, meaning, and peace.

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

(01:21) Lori’s early Love of Spanish and her sense of divine calling

(03:55) How a spontaneous walk into a building launched her entire career

(05:50) Why imagination matters more than knowledge — and what’s lost without it

(07:38) A Writing Marriage: the memoir no editor had ever seen before

(09:30) Writing inside a cathedral and the spiritual thread through her grief

(11:39) Why she wrote a book meant to be a lifelong companion, not a one-time read

(21:02) What STEM students can’t do — and why literature is the unexpected fix

(29:36) Two husbands, a move to Maui, and how the Grief and Happiness podcast was born

(33:14) Why Lori doesn’t chase happiness in grief — and what she reaches for instead

Lori Carlson-Hijuelos is an acclaimed author, editor, translator, and educator devoted to amplifying Ibero-Latin American and Latino voices in the United States. She built her career at the Americas Society in New York City, collaborating with celebrated Latin American writers and diplomats, and went on to publish more than 16 books — including her landmark bilingual anthology Cool Salsa: Bilingual Poems on Growing Up Latino in the U.S. A longtime educator at Duke University, she designs courses that help students discover how literature fosters compassion and human connection. Her latest book, A Writing Marriage, is a genre-defying memoir intertwined with the final unfinished manuscript of her late husband, Pulitzer Prize-winning novelist Oscar Hijuelos.

In this episode, Lori Carlson-Hijuelos shares the story behind A Writing Marriage — a one-of-a-kind book that weaves her own recollections of her marriage to Oscar Hijuelos with his unfinished final manuscript, Blue Antiquity. She reflects on how her path unfolded almost exactly as she had envisioned it at age 13, and speaks to the role of imagination in shaping a meaningful life — a value she has long passed on to her students. On the topic of grief, Lori offers a quietly powerful perspective: that her experience of loss has not been one of happiness exactly, but of profound awareness and hard-won understanding — a peace she continues to seek through writing and through the light she actively reaches for amid the darkness.

Connect with Lori Carlson-Hijuelos:

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Get Lori’s books!

Let’s Connect: 

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The Grief and Happiness Alliance

Book: Emily Thiroux Threatt – Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief


Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Emily Thiroux Threatt Podcast Host, Facilitator, Author

Having gone through the experience of the deaths of so many loved ones, I have learned to face life with love, optimism, and joy.

I have kept journals and written to express myself most of my life which led me to a career of teaching writing and writing books. I naturally turned to writing to help deal with my grief, then I discovered I could use writing to help friends deal with grief, too.

In contemplating how I could best help the grieving people I was working with, my Ignite moment came when realized the importance of helping people understand the importance of happiness and how they could grieve and be happy at the same time.

To share my message, I host the Grief and Happiness podcast, I wrote the book Loving and Living Your Way Though Grief, I facilitate weekly meetings of the Grief and Happiness Alliance, I founded the Grief and Happiness nonprofit foundation, I publish a weekly newsletter and blog, and my new book, The Grief and Happiness Handbook is coming out soon.