For a long time, I thought being a great principal meant being everything to everyone.

I believed great leaders solved every problem, answered every question, handled every crisis, and somehow still found time to lead the building well.

As a result, most weeks felt like survival.

From the moment I walked through the doors each morning, I was reacting to interruptions, parent complaints, student issues, and whatever urgent situation surfaced next. At the end of most weeks, I usually felt three things: relief, disappointment, and surprise at how quickly the week had disappeared.

The truth is, I thought that was leadership.

I still remember standing on the balcony level of Tiger Arena, our main gymnasium, wondering if there had to be a better way to lead. I was overwhelmed, uncertain, and honestly trying to figure leadership out on my own.

Like many principals, I thought asking for help would make me look incompetent.

Then, during my third year as principal, our new superintendent brought leadership coaches into the district. My honest reaction?

“Thank goodness.”

I knew I was struggling to stay above water.

The first day my coach spent in the building was chaos. Teachers needed my attention, students had requests, and parents were lined up waiting to complain about an issue involving the cheer program. Meanwhile, while I was triaging problems, my coach was quietly in classrooms observing teaching and learning.

Later that day, he asked me a question that changed my leadership forever.

“Do you want to be a firefighter or a leader?”

He explained that if I truly wanted to lead the building, I had to stop trying to personally handle every issue that surfaced throughout the day. I needed systems. I needed to leverage my team. Most importantly, I needed to focus on the work that mattered most.

The first thing that changed was how I worked with my secretary.

My coach spent time talking with her about how she could help protect my time and create systems that would allow me to focus on instructional leadership instead of constant interruption. She became the gatekeeper of my calendar and one of the biggest reasons my daily leadership began to transform.

Over time, that transformation spread to our leadership team.

The following year, I intentionally hired new team members and took the entire leadership team away for a two-day retreat. We got clear about roles, communication, accountability, and priorities.

Everything improved:
staff communication,
discipline systems,
professional development,
meetings,
PLCs,
and ultimately our culture.

Why?

Because we stopped operating in silos and started working in unison.

Looking back now, I think the biggest misconception I had about leadership was believing my role was to be everything to everyone. I thought great leaders were superheroes.

What I learned instead was this:

Great leaders do not try to do everything themselves.
Great leaders create Clarity, build aligned teams, and lead with intentionality.

I also learned something I wish someone had told me earlier:

It is okay to ask for help.

The people who entrusted you with leadership likely want you to succeed. But too many leaders spend years pretending they have everything figured out instead of leaning into Coaching, collaboration, and support.

And if there is one thing I know now about leadership teams, it is this:

Alignment does not happen accidentally.

If you do not take the time to get clear about priorities, roles, communication, and expectations, you will eventually pay the price later in the year.

When I think back now to that overwhelmed principal standing on the balcony of Tiger Arena, I would ask him three simple questions:

What do you truly believe as a leader?

Does your daily work align with those beliefs?

And if I asked your staff and students what mattered most to you, would their answers match yours?

Because leadership transformation begins with clarity.

And once you gain clarity, you must become intentional enough to align your time, your team, and your leadership around what matters most.

Darrin Peppard Dr. Darrin Peppard

Dr. Darrin Peppard is an author, leadership coach, consultant, and speaker focused on organizational culture and climate, and growing emerging leaders. Darrin is the best-selling author of the book Road to Awesome, and is the host of the Leaning into Leadership podcast. As a ‘recovering high school principal’, Darrin shares strategies and lessons learned from 26 years in public education to help leaders gain clarity, find joy in their work, and walk in their purpose.