In this episode of The Remarkable People Podcast, host David Pasqualone interviews author and entrepreneur Sandra Lena Silverman, a co-founder of a large mortgage business and mother of two, about her life story and the lessons she wants listeners to apply—especially learning to love themselves. Sandra shares being adopted as an infant, childhood molestation that later manifested as a severe fear of elevators, and a lifelong pattern of perfectionism and overachieving. She recounts a difficult Marriage marked by gaslighting, manipulation, and emotional abuse from a narcissistic husband, including constant body-shaming that contributed to her pursuit of numerous cosmetic procedures and surgeries. Sandra describes how the abuse escalated after pregnancy, the onset of infidelity, multiple separations (including in 2006, 2016, and 2023), and her decision to end the cycle with a final separation in 2024 and ongoing Divorce proceedings. She explains how prolonged Stress affected her Health—high cortisol, inflammation, shaking—and how those symptoms improved after leaving. Sandra discusses warning signs such as love bombing, excuses, and blame-shifting, emphasizes the need for strong boundaries, and updates listeners on her current work: her book deal for three books (including the republished From Bullshit to Botox and a forthcoming second book focused on her marriage and narcissism), her show Parties Over, and her social media presence where people can connect with her.
01:50 What You’ll Learn Today: Loving Yourself
02:56 Adopted in Maryland: Family, Identity, and Early Questions
04:58 Childhood Trauma Revealed: Molestation, Memory, and Finding Her Birth Mother
06:21 The Trauma Shows Up Later: Claustrophobia & Fear of Elevators
08:18 Perfectionism and Overachieving to Earn Love
09:37 Meeting Her Ex: The First Body-Shaming Comment
10:49 Building a Business + The First Surgery (and the Put-Downs Continue)
14:04 Pregnancy, Cruelty, and the Moment She Saw the “Monster”
16:13 Affairs, Separations, and the Crossroads She Didn’t Leave
19:05 Hard-Won Warning: Without Boundaries, It Only Gets Worse
20:11 Breaking the Cycle: Final Separation & Choosing Yourself
22:13 Healing After Abuse: Epiphanies, Boundaries, and Health Recovery
25:02 Kids, Co-Parenting, and Protecting Them from Dysfunction
26:21 Red Flags of Narcissism: Love Bombing, Gaslighting, and Blame-Shifting
29:40 Life After Leaving: Books, Podcast, New Opportunities, and Independence
32:50 Beauty vs. Self-Worth: Elective Surgery, Internal Work, and Doing It for You
35:00 Faith, Divorce, and Where to Find Sandra + Final Wrap-Up
37:25 Podcast Closing Message: Feedback, Sharing, and Living the Mission
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THE NOT-SO-FINE-PRINT DISCLAIMER:
While we are very thankful for all of our guests, please understand that we do not necessarily share or endorse the same beliefs, worldviews, or positions that they may hold. We respectfully agree to disagree in some areas, and thank God for the blessing and privilege of free will.
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