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In this week’s Quiet Confessions, I'm sharing a big change in our Family that came with a surprising mix of feelings. We finally upgraded from our beloved, tiny Honda Fit (the TARDIS!) to a minivan, a Kia Carnival, and yes, I am now officially a van parent (even though I swore I never would be!).
But this episode isn't just about car shopping. It's about an embodiment of evolution, a reminder to stop shrinking my dreams to match what I think I deserve.
Listen to feel seen, validated, and reminded that good things are allowed to happen.
🗝️Key Takeaways
- Comfort is Deserved, Not Earned: The notion that you must push through hardship to earn simple comforts like space and safety is a myth. Every parent/caregiver is deserving of peace, comfort, and joy, regardless of job status or personal struggles.
- Outgrowing Guilt is Empowerment: Intentional planning and budgeting, even when done while managing disability or chronic illness, is an empowering act. It is okay for good things to happen.
- The “Upgrade” Can Be More Than Material: A physical change, like getting a spacious new car, can embody a much deeper, personal change, an evolution away from older versions of yourself that feels less empowered.
💬Sound Bites
- “I am still grappling with shame and guilt that comes with being disabled and unable to work a regular 9-to-5 job. I'm going to smash that right now, because that's what we do here.”
- “I had to intentionally let myself feel deserving of this upgrade. And I still do. Every day, I have to remind myself: I deserve comfort. I deserve space.”
- “I think a lot of us struggle with self-worth, and we shrink our dreams down to match what we think we deserve. But we are deserving.”
- “The van isn't just a van to me. It's kind of like this embodiment of evolution as a family and as a person.”
- “We kept saying to each other, 'We deserve this. We deserve to be comfortable. Our kids deserve to be comfortable. We deserve to be safe'.”
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Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection
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Chelsea is a nonbinary, disabled/chronically ill stay-at-home parent. As a passionate advocate for those too often unheard, Chelsea is always eager to dive into honest and open conversations with other moms about the messy, challenging, and unexpected realities of parenthood. Chelsea hosts Quiet Connection: Postpartum Mental Health podcast and is a panel member on the Odd Moms On Call podcast.
Chelsea worked for 10 years in intensive-needs special Education and is still passionate about advocating for neurodiverse families. They also volunteer at a pediatric oncology camp as the planner & facilitator of their quarterly playgroup, serving the families of their youngest campers.
